Decisions
by RubyRoy87
Summary: Ok, so this is a post finale fic. But I am sure that the storyline will be significantly different from others. Give it a chance, please.
1. Chapter 1

Kate slowly opened her eyes. It was dark and she could see nothing. She could hear multiple beeping noises and in a drug induced haze she felt it strange that the beeps seemed to match the pace of her heart. All she felt was pain. She opened her eyes some more and tried to look around and remember where she was. It wasn't her apartment. She tried to move but her body wouldn't co-operate. It felt as if she was cut off from her own body. What had happened? Where was she? Was she kidnapped? Why was she feeling pain? Where was Castle? The last question invaded her mind and sent an involuntary jolt through her body. Immediately, she hissed in pain. By instinct, she bit on her lip to hold back the yelp. But she was scared. Scared and tired and confused. She felt her heart beginning to pump faster. She could hear the sound of her blood rushing over the beeping which had now become incessant.

Suddenly she saw a crack of light as the door opened noiselessly. Someone entered. Kate wanted to reach for her gun but her hands won't move. She tried her best to move and all she felt was the unbearable pain that seemed to course through her body. She heard someone groaning and slowly realized that it was her. The figure had moved closer and was now standing by the side of her bed. She heard the sound of shuffling. 'Think,' she told to herself. 'Keep calm, take in your surroundings and think,' the words of her training officer came to her mind.

Her training officer Mike. Mike was dead, wasn't he? She vaguely remembered being at a funeral. Was it Mike's? But Mike didn't have a wife and 2 kids... Whose funeral was that? Captain Montgomery's. Was the captain dead? But how? Was that Mike or Montgomery who had died? Why had her father broken down during the funeral? She remembered the coffin being lowered and her father kneeling down beside it, almost doubled up in heart wracking sobs. Why was her dad crying in Montgomery's funeral? She had to ask her mother. Her mother knew her father the best, she could probably explain what happened. Where was her mother anyway? She hadn't spoken to her mother for a long time. Why? Did they fight? Suddenly the image flashed. Her mother lying in a pool of blood in the dark in the blind alley. "Random gang violence," she heard a voice say. No, it was wrong. It was not accidental. It was pre-planned. She didn't remember how she knew it but she knew. Now she had to tell that to her father. She tried to call out but couldn't find her voice. She tried again and again... and again. She was so tired. She wanted to sleep. But she had to tell her father that what he knew about her mom's death was wrong. She wanted to walk towards her father but her legs won't carry her. Suddenly she was sinking, sinking deep. All she wanted to do was sleep. May be she could rest for a minute? Then she would get up and walk to her dad. A minute only... that's all she needed. She felt lighter than before... the pain was going away... And then the darkness descended.


	2. Chapter 2

Far away from New York City, a man was trudging a deserted street. The summer heat was unbearable and sweat was trickling down his face and neck. He was not accustomed to so much of walking and his feet hurt. He felt dizzy. He wished he could rest for a bit but he knew he couldn't... and so he kept walking.

He leaned against the heated glass door of the pay-phone booth, trying to catch a deep breath. He took in the deserted road in front of him. He sighed, partly in relief and partly in frustration. Gathering himself, he entered the booth and closed the door behind him. He quickly dialled the number that he had memorized by now. He heard the phone ring on the other side twice and then, "Dr. Parish,"

"Lanie, is she awake?"

"Castle! Where the hell are you?"

"You know I can't tell you. Is she awake?"

"Yes. She was asking for you..."

"What did you tell her?"

"Whatever you wanted me to say. But Castle, I have a bad feeling about this."

"I need to do this. You know that. Take care of Kate, please."

With that the line went dead.

25 tiles. The ceiling of her hospital cabin contained 25 white tiles. Some of them had a dirty white shade.

Kate Beckett was staring at the ceiling, seeing none of it.

Lanie's voice was replaying in her head, over and over, like a song on repeat mode on an ipod. "I'm sorry girl... Rick has left. He waited till you were out of surgery. The doctor said you were going to survive. Then he left."

Kate could not believe her ears. Rick Castle had left her? "Where did he go?"

"We haven't heard from him since. We don't know. I'm so sorry Kate." This was half true. While it was true that they didn't know where Castle was, Lanie would get occasional phone calls from Castle.

"Lanie, where did Castle go? Why didn't you ask him?"

Silence was all she got for an answer.

"Oh, I get it. The muse has got herself shot. All inspirations are dead. The defective muse now needs a replacement."

With that Kate fell silent. She fixed her eyes on a spot on the ceiling and gazed hard, willing her tears away. She succeeded. No tears came. It hurt. It hurt everywhere. Her chest hurt where her flesh was torn apart. Her insides hurt where her heart had been torn apart. For a moment she wished the bullet had taken her life. This was too painful. This was a pain that no morphine could subdue. Death would be the ultimate relief.

She immediately felt guilty. She couldn't wish for death. She had a task at hand. She had to avenge her mother's death before she thought about anything else. She had to live for her father. She remembered how devastated her father had looked earlier. No, she couldn't give up.

"You never give up, you never back down... and that's what makes you extraordinary." Suddenly the words echoed in her head as she tried desperately to distract herself by counting the tiles of hospital ceiling.

"Stay with me Kate... I love you. I love you Kate." A wave of grief suddenly rose in her chest. She had believed him. At that time, she was sure that she was dying. Her only regret had been that she wouldn't get a chance to let him know that she loved him too.

"Always..." She remembered how her heart would always warm up when she heard him say the word; how she believed that this single word was a promise. A silent promise. A lie, she thought now, bitterly. She closed her eyes to will away her tears which were disobedient and threatened to fall.

When Kate Beckett lay there, eyes closed, fighting the pain that threatened to explode inside her chest, she missed Lanie get up from her chair silently and get out of the room. She missed her best friend's guilt ridden face while she fought with herself, not to tell the truth. Lanie knew that for once, Richard Castle was right. She could not let Kate know everything. At the same time, it broke her heart to see Kate crumble down right in front of her eyes.

Once outside the cabin, Lanie closed the door softly and stood there, heaving a deep sigh. She closed her eyes and mumbled an inaudible prayer, a prayer that would not be answered for sure, "Let this be over soon."

_A/N: 'Decisions' is my first attempt at writing a fanfiction in a language that is foreign to me. So I am plagued by self-doubt. Every review helps me learn and correct myself. Every alert in my inbox makes my heart soar with joy. Thank you so much _

_Thanks to RabidRob101. In case you care to read the first chapter again, you will see that I have edited the chapter as you advised. _

_Looking forward to your support, friends._


	3. Chapter 3

Kate hissed loudly in pain when the hospital physiotherapist lifted her legs in course of exercise. All she was doing was lie on her back, clutching the bed rails tightly on either side. Kate sighed when the physiotherapist placed her legs back on bed. She had never felt this much useless in her life. For someone who would jog five miles for fun, inability to raise legs without pain shooting through her chest was frustrating.

"She needs another week before she can start her exercises," the physiotherapist told Lanie and Dr. Williams, who was Kate's case attendant.

"Another week?" Kate groaned, unable to stop herself.

"Ma'am, if you start straining now, your damaged tissues would be disrupted further. A re-suture would only prolong your recovery," the staff advised sagely.

Kate looked at Lanie.

"If you push your recovery, you will make it worse," Lanie translated the medical jargon into 'English'.

Kate made a face and replied, "Oh..."

Lanie smiled and then followed the physiotherapist and the doctor out of the room to talk to them in private. Kate sighed and closed her eyes. She had already spent 2 weeks in the hospital and now, she had to spend at least one more week, apparently.

She heard the door open and instinctively turned her head towards the sound. She saw the flowers first before she could see the man behind them. For a brief irrational moment her heart skipped as she expected those blue twinkling eyes and lopsided smile to greet her. The momentary anticipation was crushed when the tall and dark man with long hair stepped towards her and smiled shyly.

"Hey"

Kate forced a smile on her lips, "Hey Josh."

"How are you feeling?"

"How should I be feeling, Doctor?" Kate retorted and then gave him a forced smile to cover up the bitterness in her remark.

"Like you have been shot?" the doctor replied. He smiled at his own poor attempt at humour, oblivious to Kate's inner revolt.

"How's Haiti?"

"Haiti is good. They let me come once for 2 days when you were in the OR and ICU. I had to fly back. Williams has been keeping me informed. This time I managed a leave for 8 days."

Kate couldn't decide which one she disliked more, the fact that Williams 'kept him informed' about her like one of his patients or the fact that he had 'managed a leave for 8 days' because his girlfriend had been shot.

"You know, I will talk to your new boss at the precinct," Josh said, causing Kate to jolt. Of all the things, this is what he had to say?

Kate had been briefed about the new Captain of the precinct by Ryan and Esposito. A lady named Victoria Gates. "They call her 'Iron Gates' but I think we can also call her the 'Iron Bitch'. The woman only knows how to read a rulebook," Ryan had complained. "Trust me, Beckett, the bitch is not concerned about you and me. The only thing she is after is her promotion. Word is, she has always been like this, since her IA days," Esposito had added.

"I will ask the new Captain to assign you a real partner this time." Josh's voice broke Kate's chain of thought.

"What do you mean?"

"Someone who knows what he is doing."

Kate tried to calm herself. She could feel the anger rising within her.

"Josh, it was not Castle's fault that I got shot."

"He couldn't push you out of the line of fire..."

"It is not a partner's job to push you out of the line of fire... besides we were not on a mission. Nobody knew that someone would fire." Why was Kate arguing with her boyfriend for a man who had left her? Because it was the truth, she justified to herself.

"Besides, he has saved me on countless occasions."

"Don't give me that bullshit, honey. Even Castle admitted that it was his fault."

"Wha... wait, you spoke with Castle? When?"

Josh now fidgeted in his chair. He had spoken too much. "Never mind..." he muttered.

"Of course I do mind," Kate was now getting agitated. "Tell me, when did you speak to him?"

Josh hesitated but he knew better than to evade this woman's questions. "When you were in the OR."

"What did you tell Rick? Why did he leave?" Kate was breathing raggedly now, partly in anger and partly because she was trying to suppress her tears.

Josh noticed the shift from 'Castle' to 'Rick'.

"I told him the truth. I told him that he failed to protect you. He failed as a partner."

Kate could bear no more. She clamped her jaws tightly together to prevent the primal sound of rage and frustration that was fighting to emerge from her throat.

Josh did not notice. For months he had seen Kate and Castle together. She had always said that Castle was her partner. But deep down, Josh knew that when it came to Kate's priorties in life, he came a distant second to Castle. A lot of frustration had been bottled up inside him and with this incident, the floodgates had opened.

"I told him that he was destroying our shot at a normal, decent life," Josh continued, unable to stop.

When the words reached her ears, Kate lost all control. Kate almost shot up, ignoring the burning pain. "Normal, decent life? My boyfriend is out of town for 8 months a year. He doesn't bother to pick up the phone when I call because he is in surgery but he can throw tantrums if I do not pick up his phone when I am interrogating a suspect. He manages a leave for 8 days because his girlfriend is shot. He shows up after his girlfriend has spent 2 weeks in this crappy place. Is that normal or decent? Tell me Dr. Josh Davidson, how many days of leave could you possibly manage if I had been shot to death?"

Kate had lost control over her temper and her heart rate monitor was now beeping wildly. A nurse came running inside the cabin. Josh stood up.

"I should leave now..."

"Don't bother coming back, Josh. Rick Castle was the best thing that happened to my life and all you could do was blame him..."

"You don't know what you are talking about. This conversation is not over." Josh stepped away from her and out of the room.

The nurse had injected sedatives in her I.V bottle and soon, Kate's lids grew heavy and she fell asleep.

_A/N: Sorry for the delay in uploading Chapter 3. I tried really hard to create a believable Josh (as we have seen very little of him on the show). Please let me know what you think. Thanks a lot to those readers who left a review. I am eager for your input, your suggestions and your criticism._

_I may upload another chapter today :)_

**_Disclaimer: I am Andrew Marlowe and I own Castle... oh wait, that was a dream! ;)_**


	4. Chapter 4

The manila envelope lay on the uncomfortable bed of the cheap motel room. The picture of a man in grey suit and black tie peeked from inside. The man had brown hair, greyed at the temples and slate grey eyes. A charming smile adorned the boyish face, a face that did little to betray the true age of this sixty year old man. Castle didn't need to see the picture or the documents anymore. He had memorised every single detail by now. The picture belonged to Big Nate, as everyone would call him lovingly. The guy was a social role model.

Nathan McCallum was born in rural America. His father was a cook in a diner and his mother was a seamstress. As a kid, Nate attended a Catholic school which was conducted by the church. He was a model student and a model kid. He never got in trouble as a kid. Everyone loved him. When he was eighteen, he got himself enlisted in the army. He served the country in major wars. He was a valiant soldier. He had been awarded for his bravery numerous times. Then the war ended and he returned to the US.

Back home, he started working as a real estate agent. He became immensely successful, as always. He made lots of money. That's not all. He was a good son. When his father Nick was fired from the diner because of downsizing, Nate McCallum bought off the diner and renamed it as "Nick's Burger and Fries". In 2 years, the small diner expanded and became multi-chain restaurant, with branches all over the US and Nick McCallum as their owner.

When Nate's mom passed away, he opened a clothing line and dedicated it to his mother. "Hannah's Clothing N Boutique" was now an international clothing label.

So, Nick and Hannah's son Nate, the kid from suburbs who grew up on milk and cookies, had a fairy tale life. He was now one of the most powerful men in the USA. He owned a baseball team and more than half of the real estate industry, a golf course and numerous recreational clubs. He also owned half of the press, literally and almost the entire media, figuratively. Nate McCallum was also a recurring name in almost all the charity events in the country. He had millions and he donated millions. He had set up countless medical camps in Africa. He donated millions of dollars to the HIV-AIDS campaign. He championed gay marriage rights. He was the proverbial 'Power behind the Throne'. He spoke out publicly against one of the presidential policies once, and sure enough, the President was elected out by the people of America a few months later. He was once seen having dinner with a gentleman running for the Senate. The gentleman was now a successful senator. It looked like whatever Nate touched turned into gold. If Nate had been running for the office, he would have been definitely elected as the President. He was married to the same woman for 30 years now. The guy was clean, squeaky clean. There wasn't a single parking ticket in his name, let alone a criminal record. America loved Big Nate.

"Too clean," Castle sighed, leaning back on the wall.

Inside the envelope was another file. The file was from NYPD criminal records. It belonged to The Dragon. There was no photo available. Gender was presumed to be male. Age unknown. The date of The Dragon's last sighting was unknown. There were numerous descriptions about how he looked like but no two descriptions were alike. His criminal record could put Coppola's "The Godfather" to shame. Apparently, a man had once unwittingly leered at a woman who was with The Dragon in an evening party. That night the man was found dead. Cause of death was "massive haemorrhage due to non-medical castration". Anyone who ever came in The Dragon's way of business or pleasure had a knack of dying 'accidentally' or in 'random gang violence'. The man was a killing machine. He had a history of being in the armed forces. He apparently had a "business of drugs and diamonds" in Africa but that could never be proved. His name was also involved in flesh trade, extortion, assaults, torture and all other crimes possible... and Murder. Small scale businessmen to large scale industrialists, all had received threats from The Dragon at some point of their lives. Yet, in each case, the complaint would be withdrawn a day later owing to some 'misunderstanding'. A man had once tried to campaign against the extortions and he was found a week later, drowned in his own bathtub. The ME sighted the cause of death as 'alcohol intoxication followed by accidental drowning'. So on and so forth, the list went on.

If the records spoke one thing about him, it was that The Dragon never forgave and never forgot.

There was a letter clutched in Castle's hand. It was crumpled from being read over and over again for hundreds of times. The handwriting on it was too familiar for comfort. It was Roy Montgomery. Castle had recognized the handwriting on the envelope long before he opened it. It felt like Roy was speaking from his grave.

Rick,

If you are reading this letter, it means that I am dead and you know why. Don't worry, I have no regrets about that. I made a mistake once in my life and I paid for it. It is as simple as that.

In this envelope there are a few files. One of them contains the biography of Nate McCallum as in Police Database and the rest are case files related to The Dragon. By unfortunate chain of events in my life, I know that McCallum and Dragon are the same person. And by the time you read this line, you would be probably the only person alive to know that.

Son, I know that you are not a cop. You didn't sign up for all this trouble. But then, I know you for the man you are. You are brave and smart. Also, you love Kate more than your life. Please take care of her. I have always believed that I have three daughters, not two. So please keep my child safe.

Remember, if someone's record is that squeaky clean even after committing all those crimes, you know how manipulative he can be. Even if you can prove that Nate and Dragon are the same person, that will only get you killed. So the only thing you can do is make her back down somehow and keep her away from him.

I just pray to God that all the trouble ends soon and you get the life together that both of you deserve. I don't know about Kate but please forgive me if you can.

God bless,

Roy.

Castle let out a sigh as he let out a sigh as he clutched the letter in one hand and ran his other hand through his dishevelled hair.

He muttered under his breath, "Sorry Roy, Kate and I cannot have a life together anymore. But I will keep her safe as long as I am alive... or I will die trying."

_A/N: Yes, this is my second upload today. Is this double treat or double torture? Let me know by using the review button :) I had to introduce Johanna Beckett's killer in this chapter. On the show, everyone involved were afraid to tell Kate his name... afraid either for themselves or for Kate. So the character had to be heavyweight. I tried to create something. I am not sure if I am fully satisfied with the character. So feedback is always welcome._

_If you have any suggestions, please feel free to share._

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Castle. I however own the character of Nate McCallum or The Dragon. The character is completely fictitious and any resemblance with any real person, living or dead, is purely coincidental._**


	5. Chapter 5

"Are you feeling better, Katie?" Jim Beckett's voice brought Kate back to the present.

"I am fine, Dad. Don't worry..." Kate replied, gazing absently at the spot on the floor where a beam of sunlight fell through the gap between the window blinds.

"Katherine Beckett, don't lie to your father."

Kate jolted out of her thoughts and looked at her father.

"What's bothering you, kid?" Jim asked tenderly this time.

"Dad, I am not a kid," Kate seemed to smile genuinely this time.

"You will always be a kid to me, Katiebear," Jim replied smiling. "What's bothering you?"

Kate wanted to say so many things. She was worried that there was someone out there who wanted to kill her. She was worried that the same guys may also go after Castle. Castle had left her and was nowhere to be found. She had even coaxed Ryan to go Castle's loft and check on Alexis and Martha but no one was at the loft. She was finding it hard to believe that Castle had left her because of Josh. Castle was far more persistent that. If Castle were the type of person to leave every time someone asked him to leave then their partnership would have ended a long time back. Maybe something bigger was going on here and it was frustrating to be cooped up in a hospital room, knowing nothing.

Kate took in a deep breath and asked, "Dad, what happened between Castle and Josh?"

Jim was startled to hear the question and it did not escape Kate. Jim had an internal debate for a moment and then decided to go with the truth. Kate was nobody's fool. Hell, she was trained to detect lies.

"They fought when you were in the ICU."

Kate was shocked. "Fought?"

"Yes. Josh started to blame Rick for everything the moment they came face to face. Rick was already broken by then. He was already blaming himself for everything. He was afraid that he had let me down. I told him it wasn't his fault but he was not listening. He..."

"Wait, he let you down? What do you mean?"

Jim closed his eyes, bracing himself for his daughter's reaction. "I had visited him the night before the Captain was killed. I had asked him to make you step back. I thought you would be less stubborn with him but obviously I was wrong..." he trailed off.

He waited for Kate's reaction; Something, anything... but it never came. He looked at her and saw tears in her eyes.

"I am so sorry, Katie."

"Dad, he came to my apartment to try and reason with me and I hurt him. I said awful things to him. I kicked him out. I hurt him... a lot." Kate swallowed hard and then continued loudly, "anyway, what happened between Rick and Josh?"

Jim sighed. "Josh pushed Rick to the floor when he was trying to apologise."

"Oh my God..."

"So your colleagues got furious and punched the hell out of Josh. Rick left after the doctor said that you would survive."

"Esposito and Ryan actually beat up Josh?"

Her father nodded.

Kate felt dizzy. It felt like a bad dream. Her fighting with Rick, the Captain getting killed, herself getting shot, Josh hitting Rick, Ryan and Esposito beating up Josh, Rick leaving her, Martha and Alexis vanishing without a trace, her unofficial break up with Josh...

Suddenly she laughed out loud. She turned to her father and saw his confused frown.

"Dad, my life seems to be straight out of a TV show."

_A/N: I thought that Kate should have a bit more clarity about why Castle left her. Castle has his own reasons for leaving Kate but she doesn't know that. She wouldn't believe that he left her because Josh 'asked' him to leave. She knows Castle too well to believe that, right? ;) So it's time Kate had a few of her questions answered._

_Where do you think Martha and Alexis are? _

_How do you think Rick should take care of the Dragon? Should he try to expose him legally or should he go rogue and try something that might not be legal? What are your suggestions? I will incorporate your suggestions in my story :) Help me :D_

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Castle... but you already knew that, didn't you?_**


	6. Chapter 6

Richard Castle, the millionaire crime fiction writer was sprawled on the unmade bed in the cheap motel room. His face was unshaven and scruffy and hair unruly. He was still in his street clothes which had rumpled from all the stress and strain. A cheap prepaid phone lay by his side. The rest of the room was plain and ordinary... nothing stood out.

At first Rick wasn't sure what had awakened him. As he floated into the reality from his weird dreams, his eyes tried to adjust to the fading light of the room. He tried to remember where he was and after a moment, the reality came crashing to him. He realized that his phone was vibrating. He squinted his eyes to check the caller id and saw an unknown number from France.

"Hey pumpkin," he answered groggily.

"Dad! Are you okay? I called you twice before but you didn't answer... God, I was so worried..." the teenager on the other end of the line gushed.

"I am alright, sweetheart. I had fallen asleep..." Wow, was he really that tired?

"Dad, when are we going back to New York?"

"Not yet sweety... I will tell you when you can come."

"Dad please... please come to France. Please dad... You are in danger. I can't lose you dad. I need you..." Alexis almost sobbed over phone.

Rick sighed. He could feel the familiar ache in his heart.

"Pumpkin, you know I can't walk away from this... Not now, not ever..."

"Dad, don't you care about me at all?"

"It's not like that Alexis. You are smart and mature. I had hoped you would understand."

"I am also human... I get that you love Kate. But I thought you loved me more." The teenager's voice was quiet and accusing.

"Alexis, please..."

"Dad, promise one thing though... You will still be alive when all of this is over." Her voice was still quiet but deep with emotions.

"I will come back to you, I promise. Until then, please take care of yourself and Gram."

There was silence for a moment and Rick thought that the line was disconnected.

"Alexis?"

"Bye dad."

The line went dead.

Rick felt like he had been hit with a ton of bricks. His eyes prickled and he felt it hard to breathe. He loved his family. He loved Alexis more than his life. The moment he had received Montgomery's post, he had feared the worst for his own family. So he had sent her and his mother on a summer vacation to France. However, Alexis was not a fool. She had seen through the ruse almost immediately. They fought a lot, which had never happened before. After some time, she had given up. Now all she did was beg her father to return home someday, alive.

Rick felt sick. He knew that he was the one to blame. Why did he have to dredge up Kate's past? It all started with her mother's case. Though he had never admitted, at first Rick had started to poke his nose into her mother's case purely for selfish reasons. He was fascinated with the story, in Kate Beckett's back story. He had indeed wanted 'pulp for his fiction'. He wanted a peek into the amazing woman's mind. He had succeeded. The case had been a portal into Kate Beckett's world. He had found a crack in the wall that surrounded Kate's inner being. When he saw what was inside, he was lost. A glimpse of Kate's wounded yet beautiful soul had left him yearning for more. He was intimidated, he was awed and he was in love. Over time, he forced himself inside through the crack. He had never got completely inside but slowly he was inching his way in.

And now, he was caught between a rock and a hard place.

Rick was not worried about himself. He was worried about Alexis. But more importantly, he was worried about Kate. The fire burning inside that beautiful woman was what made her extraordinary. Rick was afraid that the fire would burn her out and then would be snuffed out someday, leaving behind the ashes. He was afraid that the walls would crumble and the wounded soul would be exposed to the world. The wolves and hawks would then descend and maul the tender soul until it was bloodied, bruised and ultimately battered lifeless.

Rick's vivid imagination ran wild with his thoughts and he shuddered as the image of a battered and bruised Kate flashed in his mind.

Rick shook his head and chided himself. Now was not the time to break down. He had a task at hand. He knew he had to be careful. He was planning on entering the Dragon's lair and he had to reach the Dragon alive. He had to be professional. He had to have a solid plan. He could always improvise later, if needed.

Rick had to know the details of Nate McCallum's life. The first idea that occurred to him was to shadow the Big Nate the same way he used to shadow Kate Beckett. He quickly discarded the idea. The bastard had Kate under surveillance which meant that he also knew about Rick. His cover was blown even before he went undercover. However that didn't mean that he couldn't put anyone else to the job.

He thought for some time, going over all the options in his mind. He had to create a strong cover story that would not elicit the bastard's suspicion. Someone perceptive had to shadow Big Nate all the time. They had to see things, they had to hear things and they had to analyze the information. May be then, they would discover something out of the ordinary that would expose Big Nate.

"So much for a strong plan," Rick muttered to himself.

Rick decided on whom to call for help. He picked up his phone and dialled the number. He heard the ring thrice.

"Mike Roberts speaking."

"Hey Mike, this is Rick."

"Rick! Long time no see! How are ya mate?"

"Mike, I need help."

"Ah, gotten into trouble again, I see?"

"How did you know?" Rick faked a laugh.

"Wanna tell me what it is?"

"Not over phone. Can we meet?"

"Always cryptic, Rick Castle! Sure we can meet. Do you have a place in mind?"

Rick answered yes and gave the name and address of a nearby cafeteria.

"Okay then... Meet you soon! Ricky, you haven't changed".

Rick laughed out loud and then hung up the phone. He sighed sadly.

"You have no idea."

_A/N: Okay so here is Chapter 6 for you... tell me what you think. Thanks for all the reviews and alerts. I am really grateful to you all... Reviews really make my day :)_

**_Disclaimer: If I were the owner of Castle, I would have written scripts instead of fanfiction ;)_**


	7. Chapter 7

"Welcome back," Lanie smiled as Kate hobbled inside Lanie's apartment. The hospital had released her at the long last.

"Lanie, you didn't have to do this. I could go back to my apartment..."

"Zip it, girl!" was the response even before Kate could finish her sentence. But Lanie was not quite done.

"You could definitely go back to your own apartment. No doubt about it. You could also rebuild a Styrofoam temple in your refrigerator. You could let your eggs expire their shelf life and you could let your bacon serve as a culture medium for fungi. I am sure that you don't mind one bit. You know what? I *DO* mind."

Kate was dumbfounded by this sudden burst of emotion. "Uh, okay..." was all she said.

It took half an hour for Kate to settle down in Lanie's apartment. She set all the meagre possessions that she had picked up from her apartment on her way back from the hospital in the closet. By the time she finished this simple task, she was gasping for breath.

"You are hurting. You need your meds." Lanie observed.

Kate opened her mouth to argue but the M.E would have none of it.

"Kate, you will eat something and then take your pain meds. No arguments."

As stubborn as Kate was, she could never have her way with this feisty friend.

"Yes mother," she muttered as she sighed resignedly.

After an hour, the detective was fed, cleaned and medicated for pain. She lay on Lanie's couch and was staring blankly at the TV which was playing some senseless chick flick. She saw a movement and looked up. Lanie was standing in front of her, dressed up. Kate shot her a questioning look.

"I am going out to get some food for the week. I will be back soon. You need something?"

"Ice cream?" Kate asked hopefully, not certain if the good doctor would agree.

Lanie couldn't help but smile. Kate looked like a hopeful child.

"Okay, ice cream it is. Chocolate, right?"

Kate grinned and nodded.

Lanie walked away from the couch, towards the door.

"I will be back really soon. Don't try any stunts." Lanie called out in an almost motherly tone.

Kate shook her head and smiled. As much as she hated being taken care of, she was thankful for her friend's concern.

(...)

Rick was sitting at a shady corner of the almost empty cafeteria, waiting for Mike.

Mike Roberts was Rick's old friend. They went to the same university. Even back then, both of them knew that they wanted to be writers. The two had struck up a friendship from the moment they had met. Over time, their friendship became deeper. Both of them had realized their dreams of becoming writers. While Rick chose to be a crime fiction novelist, Mike went on to become a celebrated war journalist.

They had not grown apart even after the almost two decades following university. Mike had helped Rick countless times in researching different crime scenarios from his personal experience in war crimes. Rick, on the other hand, often helped Mike to present the mundane war stories in a dramatized way so as to attract the ordinary readers. It was not only friendship, it was a healthy, respectful, symbiotic professional as well as personal relationship.

In the last year, however, Mike's fortune had dwindled. The tabloid he used to work with had decided to replace him with a younger and 'more dashing' option. Mike was now making his living through freelance journalism. With countless self-proclaimed journalists over the internet and people getting tired of the countless wars, the former war correspondent was struggling.

Rick was brought out of his reverie when he heard the chair beside him shift. He looked up to see Mike smiling down to him.

"Earth to Richard Castle!" he exclaimed.

"Hi to you too..." Rick replied, with his trademark boyish grin.

"After a long time... You look terrible."

"Wow, I am flattered."

And so their banter continued until they had ordered and their coffee arrived.

"So Rick, what is it that you wanted me to help with?" Mike started, after taking in a deep sip of his warm coffee.

"Umm... Mike, I need you to do a job, for me. It's confidential and I expect you to keep it that way."

"Of course, go ahead," Mike nodded thoughtfully.

"Think of it as an assignment. I want you to shadow Nate McCallum."

"You mean Big Nate?" Mike was paying full attention to him now.

"Yeah, Big Nate."

"What about him?"

"Look Mike, I cannot tell you everything but I have enough reason to believe that he may not be what everyone thinks he is."

"So you want me to dig up some dirt on this guy?"

"Precisely," Rick smiled, uneasily.

"Why me?"

"Because he has a history in the armed forces and you are best in the job. You could walk up to him and pretend to be researching in his story. It would be believable."

"Okay..."

Mike sounded like he needed more convincing. So Rick continued, "Look Mike, if I am wrong, if you find that the guy is indeed squeaky clean, you can still get war stories off him and help yourself. But if you find some dirt on him, you will have the biggest scoop of the decade. It's a win-win."

Mike seemed to like the idea.

"I like the idea, Ricky. Do you know anything else about him?"

"Of course," Rick proceeded to fill in Mike with all the necessary information.

An hour later, Mike got up from their table and shook Rick's hand. They smiled at each other while an advance 'gift' of fifty grand made its way into Mike's pocket, unnoticed by onlookers. Mike stretched his arms and then leisurely strolled out of the cafeteria.

Rick waited for about five minutes before exiting the cafeteria himself. When he was walking back to his motel, he remembered that he needed to make a call, one that he couldn't make from his own phone. He walked to the nearest phone booth and picked up the phone. His fingers dialled the number on their own accord. He sighed while he heard the phone ring.

(...)

Kate had dozed off on the couch, bathed in the dull blue light of the television. She was shivering slightly but it was not from cold. She was dreaming that she was back in the freezer. This dream was nothing new to her. In fact, she had often had this nightmare before. However, it was different this time. This time, she was alone. Castle was nowhere to be seen.

"Good," Kate thought to herself in her dream, even as she felt herself freezing.

She saw Jamaal's body lying in a prone position across the freezer and scampered towards it. She knelt down beside the body and turned it on its back and looked at his face.

Suddenly she was looking at Castle's lifeless face. His frozen blue eyes stared back at her. There was a shrill ring.

Kate jerked awake from her slumber, breathless and sweating profusely.

Kate was momentarily confused when she couldn't decide whether the blue light came from the TV or from the freezer. As she tried to gather her senses, the shrill ring pierced her ears again. She looked over the coffee table and realized that the shrill ring was coming from Lanie's phone.

She furrowed her brows as she scooted forward and took Lanie's phone in her hand. Lanie had forgotten to take the phone with her. As she looked at the screen, she saw an unknown number calling.

Kate debated for a moment whether to take the call or to allow the call into voicemail. She thought that it could be Lanie herself, calling from the supermarket about something.

She clicked on 'connect' and placed the phone hesitantly to her ears.

"Lanie, how is Kate?" the familiar voice assaulted her senses. Kate's heart started pumping wildly and suddenly the room didn't have enough air to breathe. Kate briefly wondered if she was still dreaming.

"Lanie?" the voice repeated.

Kate couldn't find her voice inspite of her desperate efforts. At last, she barely managed to whisper, "Rick?"

_A/N: This chapter is really long. I went with the flow and had a difficult time stopping :D I never thought I would enjoy writing a fanfiction this much. Thank you so much for your encouragement. I see my inbox fill up with your reviews, story and author alerts. I am really, really grateful to you guys. Thank you so much._

_I will stop now. Please don't forget to review. I love you guys._

**_Disclaimer: Have you ever seen my name in the Castle screen credits? You haven't. However, I own Mike Roberts. He is a figment of my imagination._**


	8. Chapter 8

"Rick?"

It was a whisper but to Rick Castle it sounded like a thunder. His heart was beating wildly and his knees were trembling. He suddenly realized that he missed Kate's voice, that beautiful, soothing, melodious voice. He also missed her smell, the sweet yet subtle cherry scent. He missed her eyes, the colour of which would shift from emerald green to greenish brown, depending on her mood. He missed that achingly beautiful smile, that unruly left canine tooth that stood out from the rest of her even teeth and only added to the cuteness of the smile. He missed the woman who could carry herself so steadily on her four inch stilettos. He missed Katherine Beckett, the strong yet soft woman.

Over the weeks, over the unending hours, over the slow minutes and countless seconds, Rick had convinced himself that he did not miss Kate Beckett. He did not deny that he was in love with Kate but he had managed to convince himself that not all love stories ended happily. Kate was in the hands of a capable man, a heart surgeon. She had a loving and caring father, a concerned best friend and teammates who were more like brothers to her. She did not need Rick, an immature fiction writer who served no good.

Rick knew he would miss her terribly. But as they say, time is the best healer. He would never forget Kate but maybe he would eventually get over her. Chances were he would be killed while trying to undo his mistakes. He did not regret the fact that he would die. All he regretted was that his dream would never come true; his dream of a blissful life with his eccentric mother, his genius daughter and the extraordinary woman who had captured his heart. It would all be over soon. In the off chance that he survived, he would pick up the broken pieces of his life and move on. One day, he would be able to put the pieces back together and mend it. It would never be the same and there would be one piece missing, the most important piece that was Kate. Still, it would be his life. He would be satisfied with that. It was acceptance, it was resignation.

He had thought he was doing quite well. He was learning from Kate how to compartmentalize feelings, put them in a box, push the box aside in the darkest corner of his mind and then ignore that it was there. He would deal with the ghosts and demons every night in his nightmares but it was bearable. He was still alive.

But Kate's voice undid it all. It undid his resolve to move on, to leave Kate alone. He couldn't place his feelings, he couldn't name them anymore. He felt great joy and he felt an unbearable pang of sorrow at the same time.

Rick's initial impulse was to hang up the phone. But he would never hang up on Kate. So he stayed on line, trying to calm himself.

Kate stayed glued to Lanie's cellphone, listening to Rick's erratic breathing. She was trying to compose herself before she felt apart. She was dizzy in a whirlwind of emotions that she never thought she was capable of feeling. She felt abandoned, betrayed and lonely. She felt grief. She also felt desperate to hear Rick's voice one more time. She wanted to see him again, to hold his hands. She wanted him to stand by her side like he always did before, so close that she could feel his breath on her shoulders. She wanted to look into his blue eyes and drown herself in the emotions she saw there, in the emotions she felt. She wanted to drown herself in his and her emotions, merged as one.

When Kate had learnt about Rick's departure for the first time, she had grieved for him in her own silent, imperceptible way. She had put on a mask of indifference and hid her burning self behind the mask. Every time she smiled, grief penetrated her soul as a white, scalding iron.

She was not new to this feeling. She had felt this pain years ago when her mother was killed. It took her a long time to recover. At that time, she was sure that she would never feel this pain again. She had vowed never to lean on someone emotionally. She had trained herself to believe that everyone was going to leave her eventually.

Then the blue eyed writer came into her life. With his childlike simplicity, he had hammered down her walls and kicked down her gates. He had entered where no one ever could and had claimed his own place in her heart, just like the chair by her desk at the precinct. He had pierced her armour, rendered her naked and vulnerable, promising to stay with her, 'Always'.

She should have known that it was true good to be true. She shouldn't have let her guard down. But she did. Now, she was feeling pain, grief and loss, all over again.

Neither of them knew how long they stayed silent on the phone.

Kate suddenly realized that she had to hear Rick's voice one more time.

"Rick, I know you are there."

"How are you Kate?" came the strained reply. If Rick were to kneel down on the pavement and bang his head repeatedly on the concrete, he would be feeling less pain than he was feeling now.

Kate didn't want to break down when the man who had left her could still hear her. So she did what she always did. She converted all her grief into anger.

"Why do you care?"

Rick felt like he had been stabbed in the heart. Keeping up this conversation with Kate would be dangerous but he couldn't help himself.

"You think I don't care for you." It was not a question.

"You do? Then why would you leave me? Why wouldn't you call?"

"It was necessary, Kate."

"You could call Lanie but you couldn't call me?" Kate clenched her jaws together even as tears streamed down her cheeks. She wouldn't cry, no, she wouldn't.

"I needed to know if you are alright."

"I am alright. You don't need to call Lanie anymore."

"Kate, forgive me."

"Rick?"

"Yes?"

Kate hesitated for a moment. Her brain was screaming not to ask the question but she needed to know.

"I remember what you said to me at the cemetery after I got shot. I just need to know... Did you mean a single word you said?"

Kate couldn't stop the sob that choked her and she cursed herself. Rick closed his eyes and leaned against the cold glass door. Shit, she remembered. It was one thing for his heart to be broken but he didn't think Kate would remember his spontaneous admission of feelings. Shit, he was such a fool.

Rick took in a deep breath. Kate Beckett deserved the truth. "Yes."

Kate released the breath she didn't realize she was holding. She wasn't sure if she could handle 'no' for an answer at that point but she had asked the question. While she was pondering over the thoughts, her lips replied automatically, "I love you too, Rick."

Rick's eyes flew open and he stood up straight. What the hell was Kate saying. Rick had laid the plans so carefully, he had so elaborately tried to remove himself from her life and now she was undoing it all with a simple sentence, the same way one can undo a fabric by pulling at a single loose thread.

"Kate, you don't mean that... I think I should go..."

"Rick, I love you. I will always love you." Kate cursed herself. What was she doing? Since when did she turn into this mushy girl on truth serum?

"Kate, don't do this. Please. You need to live. Don't do this." Rick was aware that he should have hung up by now but his brain and body had apparently been disconnected.

"Where are you, Rick? Why would you call Lanie but not me? What did I do? Where are Martha and Alexis?"

"Kate, I... Wait, how do you know about Alexis and Mom?"

"Ryan visited your loft. It was locked."

"You made Ryan visit my loft? Kate, seriously, for your own good, let me go."

"Rick, you entered my life against my wishes. I let you in. But I am not letting you go against my wishes. I don't care what I have to do to stop you. I mean it."

Rick smiled wistfully even though tears flooded his cheeks.

"Will you ever stop being stubborn?"

"Not in this lifetime."

"Kate, please listen..."

"No, you listen to me, Rick Castle, you came to me and started to shadow me against my wishes. You promised to have my back. You promised to be there for me. You said I could trust you. You said that you love me. Don't you dare to betray me now... I know you care for me or else you wouldn't have called Lanie to check on me. Stop being the good Samaritan, ok? I know how you think all of this is your fault. I know how Josh hit you and you didn't even hit back. You have given up on life. But I haven't. I am willing to take this chance and I am taking you with me, like it or not. You wanted to be my shadow... I am still alive and I can't walk without my shadow." Kate unloaded everything in a single breath.

Rick could hardly believe what he was listening. Kate was actually baring her heart to him. He had waited for this moment for more than three years and when the moment finally came, it was too late. Or was it? May be not... may be, they still had a chance. All he would have to do was wrap up the issue as quickly as possible and go back to the life as before. "Really?" He smiled wryly to himself, "you hear Beckett's voice and the old Richard Castle is back with his theories of UFOs and CIA."

Kate was waiting for Rick to say something. She had, most foolishly, opened up and laid all her cards on the table. Now she was waiting for his rejection with baited breath.

"Kate, I want to be with you for the rest of my life." Rick's brain screamed at him, "Really Rick? How responsible!" Rick ignored the screaming and continued, "but I need to do something before that, something important. After it is done, if you still feel the same about me, we shall see."

"Ok," Kate was disappointed but at least she knew that the three years of unspoken promises weren't a lie. She needed something else too. "Rick, promise me that you will call me."

"Aah detective, I see that you miss me a lot!" Rick grimanced. Where did that come from?

There was silence for a moment and then Kate replied softly, "You have no idea."

The payphone beeped, warning that the talktime was about to end.

"Kate, I have to go now."

"Until tomorrow?"

Rick smiled. It was ironic. It seemed that Rick and Kate had reversed their roles.

"Until tomorrow."

_A/N: I am very, very, very anxious about your reactions to this chapter. I tried very hard to make the conversation believable. I am worried that Kate might seem a bit OOC but from my personal experience, I know that near death situations can change a person's attitude. Besides, I feel it's time for Kate to let know Rick how she feels. If you don't like it, please feel free to review and tell me where I went wrong._

_Also, I am worried about how the number of reviews has dwindled. I am still receiving lots of story and author alerts, for which I am grateful but reviews are appreciated. I don't want to play my foreign language card over and over again but honestly, whenever you guys review, you help to clear my doubts._

_Anyway, I should stop now. Please feel free to let me know your thoughts._

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Castle, obviously._**


	9. Chapter 9

Kate was sitting on the couch, hugging her knees. Her fingers gripped Lanie's phone so firmly that her knuckles were white. She was shaking uncontrollably and there was nothing she could do to stop.

She wanted to, no, needed to put on her champion poker face before Lanie returned. She needed to pull her guards up. But she was too tired. Her heart was being crushed. The air seemed too dense to breathe and the walls seemed to close in on her. She felt a fire burning inside her chest.

"You too, Lanie?" she mumbled to herself.

Kate Beckett had been stripped off of her innocence the day her mother was murdered. Over the years, she had also lost her trust in people. She had lost her trust in her dad's promises when he repeatedly fell off the wagon and returned to seek comfort in the bottle. She still loved her dad but since then, whenever her dad made a promise, a nagging voice of doubt always ate up her insides. She had lost trust in friendship when her best friends turned their backs to her and walked off, leaving her mourning all by herself. She lost her trust in humanity over the years when she saw how little it took one to kill another. She had lost trust in love when Will, the man she had fallen in love with, chose his career over her and left. She had lost her faith in kinship when Mike Royce, her hero, her idol, turned to the dark side. Her trust had been severely shaken when Captain Montgomery, her boss, her friend, her father figure in the department, turned out to be the dirty cop involved in her mother's death.

Her faith in mankind had been once shaken when Rick Castle had laid his hands on her mother's case inspite of her specific request not to do so. Later she had come to realize that his motives were genuine. Her trust had again been rendered unstable when she woke up in the hospital and found him gone. Her heart was broken when she realized that he was calling Lanie but not her. But she had refused to believe that he had abandoned her. Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew that Rick was distancing himself from her for her own good. She had this nagging feeling that Rick was upto no good. He was doing something incredibly stupid and dangerous to keep her safe. The man was always doing wrong things for the right reasons. There was one thing about Rick that she never trusted- his judgement.

But Lanie? She never had any reason to doubt her best friend. The precinct was the only family Kate had. Ryan and Esposito were like her brothers. She trusted them with her life but she never trusted them with her emotions. Her feelings were far more valuable than her life. The only person she ever trusted enough to open her heart to was Lanie. While the others could only guess about her feelings towards Castle, Lanie was the only one who knew. Lanie was the only person who knew how close Kate had come to confessing her feelings to Rick Castle, that fateful day in summer. Lanie was the one who had pulled her out of the depression that followed. She was the one who had literally smacked her when Kate was adamant not to take Castle back in her team the following fall. Lanie was the one she called after that passionate undercover kiss with Castle had left Kate reeling with emotions. Kate remembered her feelings when she stood infront of that ticking bomb, hand in hand with Castle. "Together in death," she had thought to herself and had found it oddly poetic. Later, after the adrenaline had worn off, Kate had wondered if she needed to see a shrink for finding death poetic. Lanie was the one who had threatened to kill Rick and Kate together, in the most horrible way, if Kate indeed waited till death to be together.

Yes, Kate Beckett's emotions were far more valuable than her life and she had trusted Lanie with them.

And Lanie never told her that Castle was regularly calling her.

All this time Kate was dying to know if Castle was okay and Lanie didn't even hint that she was hearing his voice regularly.

Kate's thoughts were interrupted when the front door opened and Lanie entered.

Lanie knew immediately that something was wrong. Damn that woman, she was always exceptionally perceptive.

When Kate looked up to Lanie, her eyes were red rimmed and dark. Her usually emerald green eyes were almost brown, with the slightest hint of green. Her face was stormy and had a myriad of emotions written on it. Anger, confusion, betrayal and hurt.

Lanie took in the whole picture. It didn't take her long to guess what might have happened and when she saw her phone in Kate's hands, she knew that her worst fears had come true.

She waited for Kate to say something. She waited for Kate to yell at her, to cry. The seasoned medical examiner was always wary of Kate Beckett's temper. She knew that a storm was coming and she waited patiently to ride it out.

The yelling never came.

Kate kept staring at her friend, naked hurt etched in her eyes. She had successfully pulled back her mask face but she couldn't wipe her emotions off her beautiful eyes. Damn the medications!

The usually calm and confident doctor fidgeted under Kate's intense gaze. Never before had she been wrong in predicting Kate's reaction. This time she was. She felt like a rudder-less ship floating into an uncannily calm sea. She kept eyeing Kate wearily, silently pleading her to understand her intentions.

After what seemed to be a very long time, Kate finally spoke in a tight voice.

"I am going back to my apartment. I want you to leave me alone."

"Kate..."

"Please don't talk to me."

Kate unsteadily rose to her feet and wobbled slightly. After taking a moment to steady herself, she took tentative steps towards the guest room. Once she was inside the room, she closed the door behind her. She picked up the duffel bag that was resting on the corner of the bed and started throwing her things inside it.

The door behind her opened and Lanie entered. Kate tensed for a moment as she heard Lanie inside the room but did not turn around.

"Kate, let me explain, please."

Kate laughed mirthlessly.

"Lanie, what you have done is nothing new. People have been doing the same thing to me for a long time now. I understand."

Lanie's heart broke. Kate's voice sounded lifeless, it sounded resigned. She hated to hear resignation in her best friend's voice. She could not let Kate leave now. A resigned Kate was unknown, was new. Lanie had to know how dangerous a resigned Kate could be, particularly to herself.

"Kate, please, don't do this."

Kate turned around and looked at Lanie, her expression unreadable.

Lanie straightened up with both her hands on her hips and blocked the door. "Damn it girl, don't you see reason?"

"Lanie, stand aside. Don't make me hurt you."

"You will be walking out of this room only over my dead body. So you have two options. Either sit down and let me explain myself or go ahead and kill me." Even in the haze of her anger, Kate noticed that Lanie's voice was quivering with emotions.

After a long time of staring at each other, Kate's tired legs gave out and she swayed, gripping the handle of the closet door for support. She hobbled to the bed and sat down gingerly on the edge.

Lanie approached her and stood infront of her. When Kate refused to look up, Lanie knelt down on the floor in front of her.

"Please Kate, talk to me."

"Why?" There was agony in her voice.

At first, Lanie thought Kate was asking for a reason to talk to her but she knew better. She knew that the single word bore a lot of questions. It meant "Why did you do this to me, Lanie?" It meant "Why me?"

Lanie did not have any answer to that last question. She had seen Kate suffer long enough and more than once she had herself questioned why fate was being so cruel to someone like her. So she chose to answer the easier question.

"I was honouring his wishes. I had to."

Kate knew who 'he' meant.

"I thought I was more important to you."

"You are... don't you see, I was trying to protect you. I was trying to help. Please Kate, you are strong but everyone needs help. It is okay to seek help."

"I thought I could trust you."

"Please Kate." She was pleading with Kate now, desperation ringing in her voice.

"Lanie, I want to leave."

"Kate, when I said you would have to walk out over my dead body, I meant it."

Kate wanted to fight. She did not want to give up. Not this easily. But her eyes were falling shut. She yawned. She knew that she was losing the fight.

"Girl, please go to sleep. Don't torture yourself. If you want to burn me, I will still be here in the morning."

Kate wanted to say something to that but she couldn't think of anything. The adrenaline that she was riding high on had finally run down. She fell asleep.

_A/N: Here is chapter 9 for you. I know that this chapter does nothing to take the story forward but I didn't see how I could avoid this scene. Lanie has kept a secret from Kate for so long. Kate cannot just brush off her feelings as nothing, can she? I initially tried to mention Kate's reactions only in passing but realized that it wasn't doing Kate's character justice. So I finally relented and devoted an entire chapter to her, just as she was demanding ;)_

_Response to the last chapter was awesome. I can't thank you guys enough for reading it and taking time to review it. Traffic to the chapter on the day it was published set a new personal record :) I am grateful to you._

_Please review and let me know whether you liked the chapter. Constructive criticism is welcome._

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Castle._**


	10. Chapter 10

It was morning and sunlight was streaming into the kitchen, imparting a yellowish hue.

Lanie was standing in front of the toaster, waiting for the slices of bread to pop. She willed herself to breathe steadily and busied herself, pouring fruit juice into a glass. She was on high alert and she strained her ears for any sound coming from the guest bedroom, for any sign that indicated that Kate was awake. All she heard was silence.

After a minute, she collected the toasts and put them on an empty plate along with the eggs and bacon and placed the plate and the glass on a tray.

After calming herself down, she picked up the tray and headed towards the bedroom.

Once inside, Lanie placed the tray on the bedside table and looked at Kate. The usually formidable and tall woman lay curled up in the sheets. She looked so small and fragile. Lanie's heart broke.

Lanie sat down on the bed beside Kate's curled up body and looked down at her friend's face. Even in sleep, Kate's face was far from peaceful. There were fine lines under her eyes. It seemed like Kate had suddenly aged a lot in the past few weeks.

Lanie sighed and gently ran her fingers through Kate's hair, stroking her. She gazed absently into the wall as she recalled how they had struck up friendship for the first time.

It was years ago and Kate had just been promoted to the rank of a detective. To Lanie, she was just another detective back then. She was reserved and quiet with short hair and a strong, determined jaw line. Though quite feminine, Kate Beckett was not a bit girly. That was nothing unusual. If one needed to rise along the ladder in such a thoroughly male dominated profession, one could not afford to be girly. What set Kate different from the rest were her eyes. Her large, dark eyes were exceptionally expressive and Lanie could see sadness in them. Kate Beckett felt sadness for all the victims. She felt compassion for the victims' families. She took time to talk to the victims' loved ones. That's what set her apart. Lanie would stand aside and quietly witness Kate's compassion. She respected Detective Kate Beckett.

Then one day their relationship changed.

It was a particularly difficult case. A social worker had been found shot to death in an alley. Her 17 year old daughter had come down to the morgue to identify her mother's body. Kate had accompanied her. After seeing her mother's pale and lifeless face, the teenager had broken down.

Unknown to the ME, the case had hit too close to home for the young detective. 15 minutes after they left the morgue, Lanie had come out into the corridor to find Kate leaning against the wall, trying desperately to regain her composure.

In an impulse, the slightly older woman had walked upto the younger woman and placed a comforting hand on her shoulders. Their eyes met.

The intimacy, the friendship that started that day rapidly grew over the years and today Dr. Lanie Parish had this amazing woman named Kate Beckett as her best friend.

Then she remembered last night and she winced. She had tried to do the right thing but she had indeed hurt Kate. Badly.

When she looked down again, her hand still stroking Kate's hair, she found Kate looking at her intently with soft green eyes. God, this girl was so vulnerable. There was a sudden rush of affection in Lanie's chest and she had a strong urge to hug her friend tightly and assure her that everything would be alright.

"Good morning, sweety."

"Hey, good morning."

Lanie opened her mouth to say something. She had gone over this conversation again and again in her head last night. As she tossed and turned in her bed sleeplessly, she had made elaborate plans to convince Kate not to be angry, to prevent Kate from leaving. But in daylight, all those conversations seemed petty and insignificant. She had betrayed Kate, even though it was for noble reason. She was sorry. She was very, very sorry and Kate needed to know that.

"I am sorry, Kate. I really am..." she started.

"Shhh... I am sorry too, Lanie." In the morning light, Kate's head had cleared and she was feeling stupid for doubting her best friend's intentions.

"What are you sorry for?"

"For yelling at you last night. For being unreasonable."

"It's alright, girl. I know I have hurt you. I just hope that you will understand why I did whatever I did..."

"Lanie, I understand. I am sorry..."

"I am glad that you didn't leave."

"As if I could, after the way you drugged me." Kate playfully poked her friend's side. A small tentative smile formed on her lips.

Lanie laughed out loud. "Yes, there are certain advantages of being a doctor."

Kate joined her in the laughter and then sighed. "I am glad that I didn't leave, too."

"Ah, remember that the next time you think about fighting with me." Lanie winked.

Kate furrowed her brows, "There's going to be a next time?"

"Sure, I am trying to take care of the most stubborn woman in the universe. There will be plenty of fights."

Kate grinned.

Lanie suddenly remembered why she was there in the first place.

"Now stop grinning and have your breakfast." She said in a stern motherly tone but a genuine smile on her face undid all her efforts.

"Yes mommy." Kate's smile matched the one on Lanie's face.

Lanie sighed in relief. The morning had gone better than Lanie had expected.

_A/N: Okay, so this is my first offering of the day. Yes my dear friends, I will be uploading another chapter today. I hope it wouldn't be too much torture on you guys. I had to resolve the tension between the best friends. Initially, I felt that Kate was giving up the fight too easily. Later I reasoned that Kate is too tired with everything in her life. She can't bear to fight with her bff right now._

_Besides, I am sure that many of you are too eager to get over all this melodrama and you want to know what happens next. So I tried to keep this short. Beware, the next chapter is going to be the longest in the story till date :)_

_Please review... Please, please, please..._

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Castle. Big news! Duh!_**


	11. Chapter 11

It was a special day in Kate Beckett's life for many reasons.

Firstly, it marked two months since Kate had accidentally answered Rick's call that changed everything.

Secondly, after a month and twenty days of jogging on a treadmill and all the intense physiotherapy sessions, Kate had been finally given the permission to go for a walk outdoors, as long as she didn't walk unreasonably far.

Thirdly, after begging and coaxing for seemingly countless days, Kate had finally managed to make Richard Castle agree to meet her.

Kate fidgeted in front of the mirror staring absently at her own reflection. Her feelings seemed ridiculous even to herself. She felt like an awkward teenage girl, getting ready for her first date.

True, she didn't have to worry about what she was wearing. She didn't want to feel uncomfortable during her first walk outdoors in months. So dress and heels were out of question. But not having to worry about the dress meant that she was worrying about everything else.

She settled for the gray T-shirt and denim blue jeans that she had worn in front of Rick plenty of times before. She fussed over her hair uncountable times and at last, when she was unable to decide what to do with it, she left it loose over her shoulders. She wore minimal make up as always, only taking care to conceal the dark circles under her eyes that were the result of sleepless nights. Her mother's ring hung from the thin gold chain around her neck. Her father's watch ticked against her left wrist.

She felt sick with anxiety. They were meeting after months. How would he look? How would her react on seeing her? It was the first time they would meet since they had declared their feelings for one another. Would it be awkward? Over the couple of months, they had gotten used to talk about everything and nothing at the same time. Would it be different today? Kate had noticed that there was one topic that Rick religiously avoided... Her mother's case. Would they talk about it today?

Kate was still in front of the mirror when the front door opened and Lanie returned from her shift at the morgue.

"What the hell are you still doing here? Aren't you supposed to be out walking hand in hand with writerboy?"

"Lanie..." Kate was startled out of her thoughts, "you scared me."

"Sorry girl, but why are you still here?"

"Umm... nothing... I should go..."

"Damn right girl, now get out so that I can hop into the shower."

"Kicking me out already, huh?" Kate grinned.

Lanie gave her a classic eye roll.

"That's right. Now get out before he gets impatient and decides to storm my apartment."

"Okay, okay, leaving now. Enjoy your shower."

"No such luck, Javi is on duty right now." Lanie dramatically sighed for the effect.

"Eww, I don't need that mental picture. I am leaving, no need to torture me. See ya, Lanie."

"See ya, girl. Just don't walk too far." The kind Hispanic woman called out after her friend in a motherly tone.

"Yes, mother" Kate called back, closing the door.

Kate would never admit it out loud but she was starting to enjoy Lanie's mothering tendencies. She closed the front door behind her with a smile on her face.

(...)

Kate's feet hit the sidewalk and for the first time in months, Kate Beckett immersed herself in the stream of humans walking busily along the sidewalk. She breathed in the city air with all its dirt and pollution and stretched herself imperceptibly. She looked around happily, taking in her surroundings happily. The sun was yet to set and the golden glow of the mellowed down sun warmed her heart.

Kate Beckett loved walking on the streets. Inspite of all the murders and mugging, Kate Beckett loved the streets of New York.

Moving along the human stream, she felt alive. This was so much better than chasing imaginary miscreants on a treadmill. She felt at home.

After walking for about five minutes, she reached the corner and the park came into view. She glanced at her watch. It was quarter past four. Rick should be waiting for her in the park by now.

The familiar feeling of butterflies in her stomach returned. She was nervous and excited.

Crossing the road quickly, she reached the park gate. Shaking her head slightly, she convinced herself that everything was fine. She entered the park and briskly walked to the spot where they were supposed to meet. She looked around. Apparently, she was alone in that secluded area of the park.

Her eyes searched for Rick and she was disappointed when she did not see him.

She didn't know what to do. She wished for the umpteenth time that Rick would give her his cellphone number. She had asked him for his number but he had refused.

Suddenly she heard footsteps behind her and turned expectantly.

And there he was, Rick Castle, standing two feet away from her, with a huge bouquet of roses in his hand and wearing the brightest smile she had ever seen on his gorgeous face.

Rick had a hard time believing all this was real. He had never thought that he would see Kate Beckett again. He had kicked himself mentally a thousand times since Kate Beckett had gotten him to say 'yes' to her plans of meeting him. He knew that it was dangerous, utterly stupid and reckless. But Rick could hardly ever say 'No' to the woman he loved.

He watched Kate as she turned around, her eyes evidently expecting to see him.

On their own accord, his lips stretched themselves into the widest smile. His heart started beating wildly. He felt like he was seeing Kate Beckett for the first time all over again. He allowed his eyes to take in the sight.

The last image of Kate that was burnt in his mind had not been pretty. It had been the image of Kate, freshly out of surgery, draped in a hospital gown hardly covering her bandaged chest, hooked up on life support.

Now he had the chance to push that image to the farthest corner and take in this new image, the image of Kate, mended and regaining health, with the largest smile adorning her gorgeous face. Damn, this woman is beautiful even when she is recovering from a bullet wound.

Kate walked towards Rick, until they were standing close, face to face.

"Hey handsome," Kate said softly, unsure of what to do.

"Hey beautiful," Rick replied, charmingly as ever.

Kate shuffled slightly and looked at the bouquet that was still in Rick's hands. "Are those for me?"

Rick seemed to remember about the flowers after hearing her question.

"No, these are for a special woman who promised to meet me here."

"Uh, I see... So, why is this woman so special?"

Deep blue eyes locked with the emerald green before Rick answered, "You see, this woman has taken my heart away from me and does not intend to return it anytime soon."

Kate smiled. She was relieved. Nothing had changed. They were back in the dance, same as before. Only this time, they were sure that each was dancing to the same music as the other.

"Do you want this woman to return you your heart, Mr. Castle?"

"No, I am perfectly happy with her for having my heart. It is safer with her than it is with me." Rick told Kate the truth, even though he knew that he ran the risk of sounding corny and clichéd.

Kate's heart leapt in joy when she heard the words. May be she was just being a hopeless romantic but Rick's words sounded beautifully sweet to her ears.

"And now where would that woman be?"

"In my arms." With that, Rick move forward and pulled Kate in a tight hug.

It is funny how life is. If this had happened three months back, the hug would have been the most awkward hug of all times. Detective Kate Beckett would have been acutely conscious of the few people watching them. She would have rolled her eyes classically at the terribly clichéd conversation they had just had. She would have threatened to shoot Castle or worse still, break both his legs.

A single gunshot wound to the chest had made her wiser.

Now, Kate just melted in Rick's arms. She leaned forward and placed her head on Rick's shoulders. She moulded her body into Rick's, involuntary, as she took in his familiar scent.

"I missed you," She said almost inaudibly.

"God, Kate, I missed you too," Rick whispered into her ears as the familiar smell of cherries assaulted his olfactory senses.

The warmth of Kate's breath on his shoulders penetrated the fabric of his shirt and soaked his skin, giving him goosebumps. Emotions swelled up in his chest and threatened to run out of control.

With great power of his will, he broke the embrace and pulled away. Kate looked up to meet his eyes. Her chin was tilted up and her lips were dangerously close.

To distract himself, Rick smiled at Kate and wordlessly offered her the flowers. He watched intently as Kate took in the smell of the roses and her eyes fluttered close.

Rick cleared his throat in a desperate attempt to suppress his urge to lean down and brush his lips over her closed lashes. It had its effect. Kate opened her eyes.

"I have a gift for you."

Kate did not speak. She just looked at him, questioningly. "God, this woman can have a conversation with her eyes alone," Rick thought to himself.

He opened a small bag he had on his shoulder and brought out a gift wrapped package.

Kate took it silently and ran her fingers lightly over the wrapper. She knew what was inside it because she had received a similar gift package from him almost four years ago when they had worked their first case together. At that time he was just an incredibly handsome writer with the most annoying, flirty, playboy personality who had tried to bribe his way into the police case files and got arrested. Kate couldn't help but chuckle at the memories. She looked up at Rick.

Rick must have been thinking the same thing too because his eyes were out of focus and there was a mischievous smile at the corner of his lips. He was brought back to reality by Kate's chuckle.

Kate sensed Rick looking at her curiously and felt the need to explain. "This reminds me of the first present you ever gave me."

"Yeah," Rick grinned.

"Did you seriously think you would get away with it?"

"No, I was just having fun, detective. You were so angry, it was funny."

Kate swatted playfully on his arm. Rick tried to sober himself up a bit but failed miserably. He laughed out loudly and Kate joined him in his laughter.

"Let's go and sit somewhere," Rick suggested, not wanting to exhaust Kate. He looked around for a bench. Kate clasped his hand and pulled him forward, dragging him to the middle of the park. Rick took a moment before he realized Kate's intentions and smiled again.

They reached the sets of swings in the middle of the park. Kate flopped down on one, slightly rocking the swing but controlling with her feet firmly on the ground. Rick was far more cautious. He checked the swing seat in front of him and after having confirmed to himself that it was unlikely to buckle under his weight, he sat down.

Kate waited until Rick had settled down beside her before gently peeling the wrapper away. She opened the cardboard box with the excitement of a child opening a Christmas present.

Kate stared down breathlessly at the copy of "Heat Rises" on her lap.

Rick tried desperately to read Kate's emotions when she suddenly fell silent. But Kate was not looking at him.

"Kate..." Rick called out, tentatively.

Kate looked up to him, trying to blink back the moisture that threatened to spill onto her cheeks.

"Rick... I... Thank you," she stammered, overcome with emotions.

"Always."

As Rick stood up and positioned himself behind Kate, rocking her swing forward gently, the musical sound of the most beautiful laughter filled the park. As the sun prepared to set below the horizon, the park bathed in pure gold. It was a perfect picture of bliss where two adults were immersed in pure, innocent joy, momentarily forgetful of the complicated saga called "Life".

Little did they know that they were being watched through the telescope of a sniper rifle.

A raspy voice spoke into the transceiver.

"Both targets in sight, repeat, both targets are in sight; Requesting permission to proceed."

_A/N: This is my second offering for today. And... A Cliffhanger! What? This is nothing compared to what Andrew Marlowe left us with... but then, I am nothing compared to Andrew Marlowe ;)_

_I have an idea where the story is headed. Need to sort out the details in my head._

_I need your reviews... Please? Please? Please?_

**_Disclaimer: I own Castle. That's why Castle and Beckett are already married with nine children. That's why Captain Montgomery is still alive and playing 'daddy' to our favourite boys, Ryan and Esposito. And that's why Johanna Beckett's killer is languishing behind the bars._**


	12. Chapter 12

The feeling was exhilarating.

Kate continued to soar up into the air as the swing went higher and higher. Every time she made her way back to the ground, she would feel Rick's firm but gentle hand on her back, pushing her forward, so that she could soar up more.

After months of being confined in closed spaces, this was heaven. Kate imagined that she was flying. After all the trials and tribulations, her wings had finally healed and she was able to spread them at last. It brought her a sense of freedom. It uplifted her spirits infinitely.

She was not Detective Beckett anymore. For that brief moment, she was not the woman bearing on her shoulders the weight of her mother's murder. For that blink of an eye, she was not the tormented soul languishing behind the impenetrable walls. For that tiny spec of time, she was the fun loving green eyed girl who had been hiding for so long from the gruesome reality of death and loneliness.

She let out a shriek of excitement as the swing hit the peak of the arc, the cascade of her brown hair flowing in the wind.

"Look, look, that's Richard Castle..."

"Oh my God! It's really him."

The excited giggles and commotion that followed burst the blissful bubble that Rick and Kate had managed to wrap themselves in.

Unnoticed by both Kate and Rick, the lazy afternoon had morphed into a pleasant evening and the sparse population of the park had risen to a crowd. Apparently, her expression of exhilaration had drawn the attention of the soccer moms who brought their kids to the park for practice. Now that they had spotted Rick, they had gone wild.

Rick stopped pushing the swing and stepped aside to face the incoming crowd of near crazed women. Kate's swing slowed down and gradually came to a halt beside him.

Rick was pissed off. Rick had finally got some time with his muse, with his love after what seemed like eternity. He had finally managed to bring Kate out of her shell. Kate's exhilarated laughter had not gone unnoticed and Rick was pleased that she was having fun. He wanted to stretch the moment as long as possible. He wanted it to last forever.

Then these giggling moms in search of their afternoon gossip had to ruin the moment.

By the time Kate's feet hit the ground, they were completely surrounded by a dozen of squealing women, struggling among themselves to get as close to Castle as possible. One of them produced a sharpie miraculously, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Mr. Castle, will you sign this for me?" Someone held a scrap of blank paper in front of him. "Mr. Castle, please sign my shirt." "Mr. Castle, is that Nikki Heat with you?" "Mr. Castle may I have a photograph with the two of you?" "Mr. Castle, I am your biggest fan." "Mr. Castle, you are so brilliant." And they continued...

Muttering under his breath, Rick put up the most charming phony smile and obliged them. He had been famous long enough to know that trying to avoid the crowd would only make things worse. There would be more struggling, the women would create a scene, others would be drawn in out of curiosity and the crowd would get larger. So he tried to oblige these women and get out of the place, as quickly as possible.

Rick looked at Kate and smiled apologetically. He knew that Kate was an immensely private person. Besides, Kate had been enjoying "their moment." He didn't want her to be upset or angry.

Kate just nodded at him reassuringly, with a small smile.

Rick started moving through the crowd with Kate behind him, a forced smile plastered along his face. Slowly but steadily, they moved towards the gate and then out of the park, leaving the women busy in their excited chatter. When they managed to camouflage themselves in the endless stream of New York population on the sidewalk, they breathed out a sigh of relief.

"I am sorry." Rick said quietly, walking slowly beside Kate. He wanted to reach out and hold Kate's hands and never let go. He wanted to know desperately what was going on in her mind.

"It was not your fault Rick."

"I should have known better. God, I hate being a celebrity..."

Little did Richard Castle know that being a celebrity and getting mobbed in the park had saved them both from death.

(...)

They walked silently for some time. Neither of them knew where they were headed.

Rick wanted to know desperately what was going on in Kate's mind. He wanted to feel the warmth of her skin. He wanted to know that Kate was indeed okay with what had happened earlier. He wanted to hold her hand. But Kate had her hands firmly in her pockets. She seemed to be debating with herself about something.

Rick didn't know what to say. So he waited, his mouth shut.

"Rick, we need to talk."

Her distant voice sounded almost ominous. Rick closed his eyes in despair for a brief second. He wished with all his heart that this was not he thought it was. He was afraid that all the chaos at the park had dragged Kate back to the maze of confusion and indecision about their relationship.

"Okay... Let's get some coffee." He replied, trying to sound casual.

They entered the small cafeteria. The lady at the counter seemed to know Rick for she smiled and nodded at them and then led them to a secluded corner. She nodded at Rick again and left the table wordlessly. In a moment, a bubbly teenager stood by their table, waiting for their order.

After the waiter left with their order, they sat at the table silently, lost in their own thoughts.

It was Kate who broke the silence.

"So, what are you doing these days?"

The question brought Rick out of his thoughts with a jolt. He paused for a moment, thinking of what to say.

"Trying to finish a story." It was truth. Kate didn't need to know which story it was.

"Hmm..." Kate ran her fingers over the chequered table cloth, her eyes fixed on her fingers.

"Why wouldn't you give me your phone number?"

Rick had no answer. Why was Kate asking all the wrong questions?

Kate's fingers stopped drawing imaginary patterns on the tablecloth. She lifted her eyes and locked them with Rick's. Kate was reading him, like a book.

"What are you hiding from me, Rick?" Her voice was soft and gentle.

Rick closed his eyes tightly. He didn't want to lie and he couldn't speak the truth.

"I... I can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"I just can't..."

"Rick, you won't tell me where you are living. You won't give me your phone number. You won't tell me where Martha and Alexis are. I am not stupid, Rick. You are up to something. What is it, Rick? What are you hiding from?"

"I will tell you... later."

Kate sighed. She had tried to bring up this conversation plenty of times over phone but every time he had managed to evade. Now they were face to face and Rick looked like he was ready to bolt through the door.

"Are you doing something related to... to my mom's killer?"

"Why would you say that?" He should have known that Kate would guess correctly. Kate was a smart woman.

"I will take that as yes."

The bubbly waiter was back with their coffee. After placing their mugs in front of them, he nodded happily to both of them and left.

Kate closed her eyes and shook her head in despair. She had always known that Rick was doing something stupid. Her worst fears had just been confirmed. Rick was never a good liar. She leaned back on her chair and let out a sigh.

Rick didn't know what to do. He knew that Kate had caught up with his intentions. He shouldn't have agreed to meet Kate. This woman was goddamn perceptive.

He kept gazing into the swirling mist that rose from his coffee mug.

"Rick, do the boys know what you are doing?"

"No."

"Do you know who the killer is?"

Rick wanted to escape. His body just wanted to get up and run out through the door at top speed. It was one of those "fight or flight" situations... literally. He wanted to flee. He did not want to fight with Kate. But he could not tell her the truth... The truth would kill her.

"Kate, please don't talk about this."

"Rick, do you have a name?" That obsession, the despair that Rick had seen in her eyes months before was back. She was hyperventilating. Her hands gripped her warm mug tightly and she leaned over the table. Her eyes were once again fixed on Rick's, commanding, coaxing, begging for the truth.

"Kate..."

"Just tell me the goddamn truth, Rick." Kate's voice rose.

Rick didn't know what to do. His nightmare was coming true.

"I can't."

"You said you love me."

"I do."

"Then why can't you tell me?"

Rick wanted to scream. Why wouldn't Kate understand that he couldn't tell her the truth because he loved her?

"It will kill you, Kate."

Kate impatiently ran her fingers through her hair. She closed her eyes and took deep breaths while still leaning on the table. She wouldn't break down. She wouldn't fall apart. No, she wouldn't.

"Rick, don't you see I am already dead? I died twelve years ago in that cold, dark, alley."

"No." Rick's voice rang loudly, in conviction. "You didn't. You survived that day. She was your mother. She died that night. Your dad got broken. You got broken. But you are alive."

"Rick, you don't know anything about me." It was like déjà vu.

"Kate, don't kill your father."

"What about you, Rick?" Why was she doing this? Why were they having the same conversation as that fateful night? This time, however, he wouldn't make the same mistake. This time he would not downplay the truth.

"If anything happens to you, I swear, it would kill me. I can't see you throw your life away." His voice trembled with emotions.

Kate was silent. She sat there, looking into her coffee, seeing nothing.

"It's too late for me to back off now, Rick. I am too deep in this now. I can't walk out."

"If you can't walk out, neither can I."

Kate grew impatient.

"Why?" she almost yelled.

"I am your shadow, remember?"

Kate closed her eyes. She willed away the tears that threatened to break free.

"My life is a mess."

Rick leaned across the table to reach her hand and gently squeezed it.

Kate opened her eyes and looked at him, again.

"Rick, if you are doing something dangerous, at least take me with you. You shouldn't have to fight this alone"

Rick's heart jumped at the thought. They could be together again. They would bounce back ideas and theories, they could... NO! What was he thinking? He had left Kate alone at the hospital because he needed to do this alone. He had set so many elaborate plans, he was working so hard to find a clue, a link that could undo the Dragon. He could not bring Kate into this. When it came to Johanna Beckett's murder, Kate's sense of logic always flew out of the window. Once she knew, she would run blindly into the animal's lair. Months of pain and loneliness and preparation would go waste if Kate got killed.

"We can't do this together."

"Damn you, Rick!"

Their conversation was broken by shrill ringing of Kate's cellphone. Kate jerked back and brought the phone out of her pocket. It was Lanie calling.

"What is it, Lanie?" Irritation was evident in her voice.

"Oooo... you are pissed off at me. What did I interrupt?"

"A conversation."

"Yeah, right." Kate could almost hear Lanie smirking at her.

"Why did you call me?"

"It's getting late and I was wondering when you would return."

"Umm... I am leaving the cafe, now."

"Hey, don't cut your date short for me."

Date. Kate almost laughed out. This had been one hell of a date so far.

"I will back soon, Lanie."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah. Bye."

Kate didn't wait for Lanie's response before disconnecting the call.

Rick was watching Kate intently as she was talking on the phone. Once she disconnected the call, she stood up and picked up her jacket from the chair.

"I need to leave. Laine is waiting for me."

Rick sighed resignedly. "Okay, let me pay for the coffee." The coffee they didn't drink.

They walked back silently to Lanie's apartment. Neither of them was willing to break the silence. When they ultimately reached their destination, they stood outside for a moment, looking at each other in awkward silence.

"So..." Kate started.

"Hell of a first date, huh?" Rick smiled, partly forced.

"Yeah..." Kate nodded.

"Don't forget to take your present with you." Rick took out the copy of his book from his bag and handed it over to Kate.

"Oh God!" Kate slapped her forehead when she remembered that she had left the flowers on the park bench in their hurry to leave.

Rick understood Kate's reactions. He smiled. "Don't worry Kate. You will get fresh roses tomorrow."

Kate smiled. Rick could be so sweet. She leaned forward and brushed her lips over his. She didn't deepen it into a kiss because she didn't want to add any new emotions to the violent turmoil going on inside her.

She stepped away from him. "Night, Rick."

Before she could change her mind and mash her lips against his, she turned around and went inside.

Rick kept looking at her retreating form until she closed the door.

"Night, Kate." He mumbled to himself.

He wouldn't make his usual promise of 'Until tomorrow.' He wasn't sure if there would be a tomorrow.

_A/N: I am very worried about this chapter, particularly about the conversation between Kate and Rick. It had to be intense, emotional and believable. I don't think Kate and Rick are the type of people who yell at each other in a coffee shop. So they had to be quiet but expressive. Kate would never back down without a proper explanation. It was very difficult to write and I am not sure how I feel about it. _

_About the sniper part, I did a bit of research (read: 'watched loads of action movies'!) Any sudden, unexpected movement, either on the part of the target or people surrounding them, usually deters the sniper from firing. If a sniper hits a wrong target, it alerts the intended target and leaves behind too much of mess. The Dragon's men cannot be that sloppy._

_Please let me know how you feel about this chapter. It is very important. I am writing this after long hours of duty at the hospital... Leave me some love :)_

_**Disclaimer: I own Castle. No biggie, I also own the Universe! ;)**_


	13. Chapter 13

It was ten at night. Kate Beckett sat stiffly on the bed in Lanie's guestroom, brooding and staring at the opposite wall.

She was thinking over everything that had happened earlier that day. She remembered all the happy memories, the park, the swing, the forgotten bouquet of roses and the advanced copy of 'Heat Rises'. She remembered Rick's smile, the twinkle in his eyes, his scent and the feeling of his strong hands on her back.

She also remembered the hesitation, the guilt clouding his features, the sadness, the disappointment and the regret.

She sighed. Her life was indeed a mess.

She trusted Rick. She knew beyond doubt that his intentions were pure. There was no way he would let her come to any harm. Rick loved her and would protect her, even with his life. She knew that.

And she was afraid because she knew that.

She was acutely aware of the situation. She had put her hand into the snake pit. She had almost touched thepoisonous snake. She felt upon her skin the moist coolness of its scaly skin. The warmth of her presence had awakened the snake from its hibernation. It had now coiled itself around her probing hand. Kate was now stranded midway inside the pit. She could not draw her hand back without being bitten. The only way was to dig her hand deeper and deeper into the hole. Kate didn't want to go deeper than she already was but she had no choice.

She knew Rick was trying to behead the snake. He was trying to draw its attention so that it would uncoil itself from Kate and slither towards him. He was trying to get Kate free. It was stupid, it was suicidal but it was classically Rick Castle.

She let out a harsh breath. She hated to put Rick in this situation, she wanted to help him. She wanted to be there with him. She wanted to be his shield, his bullet proof vest. But Rick wouldn't even tell her where he was staying. Only if she had any way of knowing where he was staying...

Frustrated, Kate looked for something to keep herself busy. She found a perfect way. She pulled open the drawer of the nightstand and brought out her Glock 19. Technically, she wasn't allowed to keep her weapons as she was off duty. But these were special circumstances. Her life was in danger. So while she had been stripped off of her back up Glock 26, Captain Victoria Gates had allowed her to keep the other gun. Of course, Kate had to sign a waiver saying she would use her weapon only in extreme cases and only for self defence.

Kate set about to clean the gun, taking her time to slowly disassemble the weapon, savouring the feeling of the cool metal on her warm skin. The feel of the weapon was the only reminder of her job. It was the only certainty in her life at the moment and she cherished it. As she took the slide off and removed the barrel and the side spring, she wished she could disassemble the jumbled parts of her life this objectively. As she cleaned off the barrel and brushed the spring clean, she wondered how difficult it would be clean her life off the current mess.

The experienced detective didn't need much time or effort to reassemble the pistol. She allowed her mind to roam freely, mulling over her options while her hands did the job on their own. After the Glock was complete again, she reloaded the gun and clicked the safety on. The familiar click of the metal brought her relief over the sickening silence and she stared blankly at the gun, her old friend, which had saved her life countless times.

Her chain of thought was broken by sound of the doorbell. As she heard Lanie hurrying towards the door, she placed her pistol under her pillow, ready to be pulled out instantly if required. When she heard Lanie's quiet voice through her closed bedroom door and was certain that they were in no immediate danger, she pulled her hand away from under the pillow and rubbed it on the jeans covering her thigh, wondering who the visitor could be at such an ungodly hour.

She heard a knock on her door and then it cracked open. Lanie peeked inside.

"Kate, you have a visitor."

"Who?"

"Josh."

"Josh? What's he doing here?" Kate's brows furrowed in confusion.

"I don't know, girl. Do you want to meet him or should I kick him out?"

"Umm... Let me see what he wants."

Kate padded barefoot to the living room. Josh was standing by the door awkwardly, both his hands shoved into his pockets. Apparently, Lanie had not acted as a hospitable host to this unexpected visitor.

"What do you want, Josh?" Kate asked coldly.

"Well, hello to you too."

"Josh, why are you here?"

"I returned from Haiti a couple of days earlier. Thought I would drop by to see how my girlfriend is doing..."

"Girlfriend?"

"Look, I remember what happened in the hospital but you were sedated and your emotions ran haywire. I know you didn't mean it."

"Well, in that case, you know wrong. I meant it when I asked you not to come back." Her voice was dull.

"This is just post traumatic stress. You want everything around you to change. You want to start afresh. You don't want to go back to your life..."

Kate was losing her patience fast. "Josh, cut the psychobabble. I don't want this anymore. Don't blame any trauma for that."

"Why, Kate?"

"Seriously Josh? You want a reason? You're never here for me."

"We talked about it Kate. You were perfectly fine with it. You even said that it helped both our careers. What changed?"

Kate was silent for a moment. It was a good question. She debated internally if she should answer the question honestly.

"Josh, I came too close to dying. I realized that life is passing by me."

"It's about Castle, isn't it?"

"What about him?"

"Don't play dumb, Kate. You know what I mean." Josh was getting agitated.

"Humour me." Kate straightened herself and crossed her arms across her chest.

They glared at each other for a moment before Josh budged.

"I know you're a fan of his writing. Your bookshelves are full of his books. There isn't a single book written by him that you don't own. And he shadows you all the time. He's always saying the right things, he's always playing with words. You feel flattered. You are in love with him. You think he is in love with you too."

"I know that he's in love with me."

"Really Kate, are you that naive?"

"Don't talk about things you don't know."

"Oh I know what I'm talking about. Rich, famous men who think they own the world. They use women as toys. They play with them and they break them. He'll..."

"Josh, STOP."

"Of course Kate, you will shut me up. No one wants to listen to the bitter truth. You'll realize it only when you've already ended up as one of his toys."

"Get out."

The handsome doctor huffed in disgust and stomped to the door.

"Kate, you think I'm always away. That's because I'm trying to help people. If I didn't have a real job, I'd be following you day and night as well."

"Josh, you don't know anything about Castle."

"I know he is seeing plenty of whores in suburban New York."

"What do you mean?"

"I got called to an accident site just outside the city last night. When I was on my way back, I saw your writer entering Motel HappyNight... Can you imagine? *Motel HappyNight?* Does that man even have class, Kate? An obscenely rich writer entering Motel HappyNight to see a hooker? Can't he even pay for escort services?" Josh spat.

Kate was quiet. Her heart was beating wildly. Josh had inadvertently given her the information she was yearning for. May be it was kismet.

She gathered her thoughts for a minute. She had to know everything Josh knew without alarming him.

Josh took her silence as shock and smiled smugly.

"You see Kate, you are making a mistake."

Kate wanted to yell. She wanted to slap the smug smile off his face. She wanted him to know that Rick was not there for pleasure. Rick was there because he was hiding from the guys that he was messing with. But she could not do that.

"He could have been there on business."

"Seriously Kate? Are you listening to yourself? You are trying to defend him! It's obvious why he was there. Millionaire writers don't conduct business in shady motels."

"What makes you think he went there to see a hooker?" Being a detective, Kate knew how to press for information.

"The doorman nodded at him. It was obvious that he was a regular there."

So Rick was staying at a cheap motel where no one would expect him to stay. That was smart.

"And you saw all this on your way back from your call-site?"

Josh hesitated. "I might have stopped my bike when I saw him."

Kate sighed. "Look Josh, the truth is you and I had nothing to begin with. You were doing your job and I was doing mine. When our off times coincided, we had a few dinners together and we slept together. That's it. But we never bonded. Sadly, I realized all this when I thought I was dying."

Josh shook his head and laughed bitterly. "I never stood a chance. You spent all your time and energy with Castle. I never had a chance. Goodbye Kate"

He stormed off before Kate could formulate a response.

Kate stood there, staring at the door. She was not mourning Josh's departure. She was not even thinking about him.

She had some new information tonight and the detective in her was processing them. She was crafting out new plans.

"Are you okay?" she heard Lanie speak softly.

She turned around to face her friend. "I need to go for a walk." With that she went back into the bedroom to gather her jacket. She hid her gun under the jacket.

Lanie tried to protest but she knew that it was useless.

Kate smiled at her friend. "I won't go too far. I promise."

Detective Kate Beckett smiled when her feet hit the sidewalk this time. The City never slept and she had no difficulty in losing herself in the crowd. The darkness of the night shrouded her from the potential danger of any sniper. The feel of the cool metal of the gun against her skin assured her and in the fresh air, her brain started formulating new plans. She walked forward confidently.

She had a task at hand.

_A/N: I know nothing about New York City. I don't even live in the US. So the geography in the story is vague._

_Motel HappyNight is fictitious. I don't think a motel would have such a ridiculous name in reality. _

_I did some research on Beckett's gun and according to Wikipedia, both of her guns are 9mm. She uses a Glock 19 (she has used Glock 17 in some episodes) and she keeps a Glock 26 as a backup which she gave to Castle twice, once during episode 'Boom' and again in the Season 3 premiere. _

_I don't own a gun. So I don't know how to clean them. All the steps are according to a video on youtube, so chances are there are plenty of inconsistencies in the description. Don't buy a Glock and try to clean it after reading my story (Just Saying)!_

_See, even Josh can be helpful. That too when he is being a bitch ;)_

_Can you guess that we are reaching the climax pretty soon? :D_

_**Disclaimer: If I were the owner of Castle, I would be too busy with Season 4 to write a fanfiction.**_


	14. Chapter 14

Rick entered the shabby motel room and kicked off his shoes. He didn't even bother to switch on the light. He flopped down on the bed and popped open a few buttons of his shirt so that it now hung over his shoulders. He was feeling exhausted. He ran his hand through his hair and sighed.

The innumerable sleepless nights were finally taking toll on his body.

But he could not afford to rest now, especially now that he was so close to The Dragon.

Taking in another deep breath, he hauled himself from the bed and stood up. He flipped the light switch on and a dim glow spread across the room, making it look gloomy. But Rick didn't have the time to think about the state of his room.

He walked over to the small, worn out wooden table at the corner of the room and knelt beside it. He retrieved the files that he had taped under the table. He looked around for any telltale sign of intrusion. There was none.

Satisfied, he looked towards the door and the window to make sure that they were locked. He sat down on the uncomfortable chair and stretched his legs under the table. He opened the files and spread them across the table. A ghost of a smile formed over his lips.

He was looking at the details of the deleted records of Big Nate's crimes off the Federal database.

A nagging doubt started to rear its head in Rick Castle's ever optimistic mind. How was he supposed to take down someone who had managed to delete his crime records off the federal database?

Quickly, he squashed the doubts before they could feed off his hope and grow stronger. He would find a way. He had to find a way. May be he could release the data to the media? It was true that Big Nate owned more than half of the press but in modern world, there were other ways of reaching the masses. There was the all powerful internet. May be he could start something big... Who knew? Big powers came undone by ordinary people who knew how to handle the power of internet. To add to that, Rick Castle had two other powers: the power of words and the power of money. He had all the power in the world.

Now, he had to only concentrate on staying alive.

Rick leaned back on the chair and closed his eyes. His mind was working furiously. He was chalking up plans, each better than the other.

He would not put up anything on the internet tonight. He would not act hastily. He couldn't afford any false start. He had to light the spark at the right spot to start the conflagration. The Dragon would burn in his own fire. He could not do anything that would alert the animal beforehand.

He rubbed his face with his palms, trying to erase the weariness off his face.

Mike had said earlier that he was onto something even bigger; something that would prove without doubt that Big Nate was no saint. He didn't spell out what it was but he promised Rick that he would get it in a week.

Rick briefly wondered how Mike had managed to be so successful in such a little time. He had no doubt that Mike was the best in the job, that's why he had approached Mike in the first place. But gathering all this information in two months? Even for an ace reporter like Mike, it was unnatural.

Maybe he had gotten lucky... But was there anything called luck?

"Hell, now I have started second guessing Luck! Way to go Rick! You are officially a pessimist." He laughed bitterly at himself.

He must have dozed off because when the phone vibrated beside him, he jumped up and banged his knee against the table in the process. He cursed himself loudly and fumbled with the phone. Evidently, all his time undercover had not taught him to be less clumsy.

He squinted his sleepy eyes to look at the caller id.

"Hey Mike!"

"Rick, never let the phone ring more than twice if you're expecting a tip-off. That's the first step of being a good reporter."

"I thought you're the reporter."

"Well well Rick Castle, are you ready for some news?"

"Mike, can you come straight to the point?"

"Someone's a bit cranky tonight, Ricky!"

"Yeah, that's because I just banged my knee and it's paining. Now can I hear the news?"

"Well, if you must know, I have hit the jackpot."

"We have?"

There was a moment of silence. "Yes."

"What have you found?" Rick tried hard to keep the eagerness from showing and failed miserably.

"I can't tell you over the phone. Why don't you come and see it? And bring the files with you. We need to add certain things."

That was certainly an odd request but Rick knew better than to argue.

"Where?"

"There's a warehouse at the corner of the 22nd and 5th."

"Should I bring a camera?"

"I already have a camera, Rick. I'm a reporter, remember?" Mike sounded cheerful. What could Mike have found that made him so cheerful? Or maybe, Rick was being bitter.

"Okay, I'm on my way." Rick hung up the phone.

Rick quickly buttoned up his shirt, not bothering to change the garment. He fumbled under the table and found the Gold Beretta 96 taped under it. He tore it off and stashed the expensive pistol under his trousers in his socks.

He allowed his mind to remember for a moment the time when he had splurged on this expensive gun. He had seen this beautiful weapon on exhibition at a gun shop he frequented for research. It had immediately reminded him of 'the Man with the Golden Gun', the man who had inspired him to dive into the world of crime fiction... James Bond. So without thinking twice he had emptied his pockets to buy the golden gun. He was ecstatic at that time, having found something cool to show off to his poker buddies. Those were the happy days.

Little did he imagine then that someday, the gun would be his constant companion for self defence.

Rick shook his head to chase away the dark thoughts. He had no time to lose. He quickly stuffed all his files in the messenger bag and slung it over his shoulder. He picked up a pen from the table and put it in front pocket of his shirt with care.

He looked back over his shoulder once and after making sure that he had everything he needed, he left.

He walked out into the cool air of the night but didn't take a moment to savour it. Instead he quickly flagged down a cab, gave the driver an address a block away from his destination and sped off.

Rick was so lost in his thoughts that he did not even notice the cab that almost came to a halt in front of his motel and then picked up speed, following his own.

(...)

Rick came back to reality only when the cab stopped. He quickly paid the driver and got off, walking briskly towards the warehouse.

Once he reached the warehouse, he didn't know what to do. It looked abandoned. He walked into it blindly. It was dark inside. Rick could hardly see a thing.

He suddenly sensed a movement at his side. He was alarmed.

"Mike, is that you?"

"Yes Rick," the familiar voice responded.

Rick breathed out a sigh of relief and tried to calm down the wild beating of his heart.

It was then that he felt the cold muzzle of a gun pressed against his temple.

_A/N: paneneneneh neneneh paneneneh neneh panenenene... *Ahem* I was just... lost in the moment. Btw, did you recognize that tune? You should! )_

_I am having too much fun writing this now. I had to stop this chapter here because... because if I didn't, it would be around 6,000 words long. Sorry for the cliffhanger. Don't kill me. I can't write the next chapter if I am dead :D_

_**Disclaimer: If I were the owner of Castle, all this would have happened in Season 4. And yes, I wouldn't bring in a lust interest for... Oops! Spoiler!**_


	15. Chapter 15

Rick swallowed.

His beating heart threatened to jump out of his mouth. He could feel sweat trickling down his face and pooling into the hollow of his neck. His drenched shirt stuck to his back stubbornly. He suddenly felt like he was in a furnace.

The cool metal of the muzzle of the gun was obscenely soothing against his skin.

"Really Mike?" he struggled hear his own voice over the rush of blood in his ears.

"I'm sorry." Mike's voice was quiet and almost apologetic.

"You said we hit the jackpot..." Rick's voice trailed off.

"I didn't say 'we', Rick. I said I've hit the jackpot."

"Why?" Rick's voice was pained.

"He has offered me something I can't refuse."

"Who? The Dragon?"

"Hmmm..."

"Mike, you believe him? You have seen everything in the files. You believe him?"

Mike shoved him forward and he slightly stumbled in the darkness. He straightened himself. He had no option but to follow Mike.

His first instinct was to duck and punch in Mike's face but Rick knew that would be futile. Not only was Mike a war reporter, he was himself trained in combat. Also, he was huge. Mike could definitely break every bone in his body with no effort at all.

So he stumbled along.

Mike broke the silence. "Do you think I could've laid my hands on those files if Nate hadn't wanted me to?"

"So now you're in first name basis with the Devil?"

"Yes, Rick... and it's so intoxicating."

"Mike, what's wrong with you?"

"Nate is the Devil with a heart, Rick. He caught me last week. I was trying to snoop into his office and he caught me. I was sure that he'd kill me. But he didn't. Instead he made me an offer."

Rick was too disgusted to make a comment. Mike didn't wait for him anyway. It seemed like Mike was riding high on euphoria.

"He wants you. All he wants is you... In return, I get my own column in eight different papers across America and seventeen worldwide. I will write my own book and it will be translated into seven languages. Seven, Rick, seven... How many of your books have been translated into seven different languages, Rick?"

Rick sighed.

"Mike, he'll kill you."

"Shut up." Mike's loud voice echoed across the empty warehouse as they continued to move forward.

"It's about time, Rick... I hate you anyway. All these years, I braved out in the warzones. I covered gunfights, I covered blasts. I got kidnapped by the guerrillas. And what did you do? You sat in your drawing room, encouraging your kid to tie you up to the chair for fun. I never had a kid, Rick. I was better than you in college but you're more successful. You lived a blissful life in your office. You had fun in your book parties. You earned money, Rick, green, crispy, dollars for writing trash while I got the boot for writing the truth. It's not fair, Rick! And yet, you dare to ring me up for a favour. I hate you Rick Castle. It's about time you died. I wish I could be the one to blow your brain into a pulp."

Mike was getting agitated. Rick could feel Mike's spit rain down on his cheek. Mike's cruel, manic voice was dripping with hatred. Rick had considered his man to be his friend. A shiver ran down his spine.

"Mike, he'll kill you." Rick tried again.

"No Rick Castle, he will kill you." Mike's short laughter sounded almost metallic.

For a brief moment, Rick considered the possibility that his friend had been replaced by a robot... or a clone... or a shape shifting alien... or anything. This was not Mike, this could not be Mike.

Rick mentally slapped himself as soon as he realized the absurdity of his chain of thoughts.

Since his childhood, whenever reality was too harsh for Rick, he would escape into a world of fantasy and imagination; a world where he had a valiant knight for a father, where he had innumerable satyrs and elves as friends who would sing him praise day and night... then as he grew up, his fantasy world became more convoluted, it involved beautiful angels and later pretty naked cheerleaders as he entered adolescence... and now, there was this beautiful green-eyed princess whose mother had been murdered by an evil dragon and the princess herself had been cursed to live in a joyless world. It was all up to Castle to slay the dragon and free the princess, to kiss her and ride off into the sunset together... living happily ever after.

Now that this betrayal was too harsh for him to bear, Rick wanted to dash into the fantasy world and hide himself; to create an excuse for his dear friend Mike; to defend him; his mind wanted to believe that the real Mike was sleeping somewhere far away or was under some form of curse.

Yes, Mike was under curse. He was under the curse of greed, jealousy and hatred.

Lost in his thoughts, Rick hardly noticed where they were going. So when a door opened suddenly and bright light shone on his face abruptly, he closed his eyes and staggered backward.

Mike barked at Rick and then shoved him forward roughly. Rick fell to the ground and almost slid to the middle of the room.

"Here he is, Nate."

When Rick's eyes adjusted to the sudden brightness, he looked around. He could see someone stand in between him and Mike but the man had his back to Rick.

"Thanks Mike." The baritone voice sounded icy cold.

"You owe me, Nate. It's your turn now." There was a smug smile on Mike's face... and a sick satisfaction.

"It's my turn now, indeed."

A loud gunshot rang through the warehouse. Mike's body crumbled on the floor, his lifeless blue eyes staring at the ceiling and the smug smile still fixed on his face.

The man turned around and looked down at Rick. Rick swallowed. He was looking at the Dragon.

The man looked nothing like his photograph. He was not wearing a suit and a tie here. He was wearing a sleeveless grey T-shirt that hugged his muscular body like a glove. Rick had to admit that despite his age, Nate had not lost the body that he had achieved during his armed forces days.

A tattoo typical of the military could be seen on his right forearm. His left biceps was adorned with the huge tattoo of a dragon- dark and fierce. Rick realized why his nickname was The Dragon.

His face always held a boyish charm on magazines and newspapers. Not here. His face was neutral and his gray eyes were like steel.

"Richard Castle," the baritone voice started breathily. "I've heard a lot about you."

Rick kept quiet, mainly because he couldn't find his voice. Never in his life had he been intimidated by anyone as he was by this man. He was expecting to feel the pain of a bullet burning through his flesh any moment. The gun in Nathan McCallum's hand was pointed to the ground but as Rick had seen minutes before, it took Nate less than quarter of a second to point it at someone and shoot him to death.

"I've read your books, Mr. Castle. Derrick Storm is my favourite," If Rick closed his eyes and ignored the coldness of his voice, he could almost pass it off as a conversation with a fan.

"Do you know what my favourite part is?"

Rick shook his head mutely.

"My favourite part is when the bullet cracks through his skull." Nate smiled. It was a predatory, blood curling smile. "Your descriptive powers are extraordinary, Mr. Castle. I could almost hear the bullet go through his brain."

Rick vowed to himself, if he survived this night miraculously, he wouldn't write another death scene for the rest of his life.

"A detective, smart, brave and energetic, who always caught the bad guys and brought them justice... but then someone shoots and kills him... He catches murderers but can't stop his own. Now that's poetic."

Rick kept looking into his gray eyes, like a deer caught in headlight.

"Personally though, I would prefer a bullet through his heart."

An image of Kate being shot in the chest flashed in front of Rick's eyes and a cold dread descended on him.

"Do you know the other thing I like about your books?" Nate was just talking lazily.

Rick didn't answer.

Apparently Nate was not expecting an answer either. "Reality resembles your books."

Rick had no doubt what he meant. A certain detective was about to be shot. Again. Through the heart.

Nate bent down over Rick and fixed his blue eyes with his steel ones.

"Mr. Castle, when someone is praising you, it's polite to thank him."

Outrage gave back Rick his voice. "Nate, all your secrets are buried deep. You're killing me anyway. Spare her."

"Mr. Castle, you disappoint me. I didn't peg you to be the begging type." His voice was clipped and professional... and hollow.

"Why did you kill Johanna Beckett?"

Nathan McCallum looked at Rick, almost surprised. That was the first flicker of emotion Rick had managed to elicit on his face. Rick mentally did a fist pump. Now that he was certain that he would die, he suddenly felt... strangely excited. The same excitement he felt when someone spoke of crime scenes or when he thought out a new intriguing way to kill off someone in his book.

"She was a collateral damage." He shrugged casually.

A collateral damage that destroyed other lives, Rick thought bitterly.

The Dragon looked at Rick coolly.

"How do you manage to keep your two lives separate, Nate?"

"That's not easy, Mr. Castle. It requires a lot of hard work. It requires men who are faithful. It requires sources. This warehouse? It contains the evidence of at least two hundred of my crimes. I like keeping trophies; at least a small something that I can look at and remember. Do you think it's easy to hide my trophies in plain sight, Mr. Castle?"

"I have another question." Rick had now almost forgotten the fear of his impending death, fascinated by 'the story'.

"Ah, Mr. Castle, your reputation precedes you. You are known to be the most talkative member of the NYPD."

"True." Rick grinned forcefully.

"You are lucky that I decided to deal with you myself and sent my men on a break. Otherwise, they would've beaten you into a pulp by now for talking back to me. Anyway Mr. Castle, go ahead. It's good to have some answers before death. Helps to have some closure, right?" Nate McCallum smiled and Rick was suddenly reminded of the movie 'Jaws'.

"Are you going to shoot me through my skull or through my heart?"

"I'm going to shoot you right in between your eyes, Mr. Castle." There was a silky smoothness in his voice. "Any other question?"

"Yes, one more actually. Any of your men could kill me anytime. Why here? Why you?"

The killer regarded Rick for a moment with those dead eyes.

"Mr. Richard Castle, you are special. You are smart. Your theories almost undid me for a couple of times. I know how you punched my main man unconscious. He had to waste his time in prison for four months. You pushed the detective away and lent her a few more months to live. You always upset my routine. I had to meet you at least once." There was a cold fury in his voice. "Besides, once you're dead, you'll be my trophy."

Rick felt like throwing up. "Trophy?"

"Yes, Mr. Castle. Under this floor, there are four bodies; reminders of four people who were almost my match but not quite. You will the fifth. Your detective will join you as the sixth. Hope that will complete the set and I wouldn't have to add more. Otherwise, I would have to create a bigger area for all of you. It would take a lot of time and effort."

Rick had a sickening feeling, like this psychopath was talking about trophies and a group of people at the same time.

"So now that I have answered all your questions, I think, I should finish my business here. It's getting late. My wife hates reheating the dinner." Nate casually shrugged.

"Shouldn't you offer me a blindfold and a cigarette?" Anything to stall the inevitable.

"No Mr. Castle, this is not a firing squad. I suggest you don't miss the opportunity of meeting death face to face. It happens only once in a lifetime." A part of Rick wanted to slap this man senseless, the other part was intrigued by the psychopath.

The Dragon straightened and pointed his gun right at Rick Castle's forehead, aiming for in between his eyes. Rick couldn't help but close his eyes.

A shot rang out loud, echoing off the walls of the empty warehouse.

(...)

"Oh, so this is how death feels like. Wow, it didn't hurt." That was the first thought that came to his mind.

"But how is this different from life? I can still feel my knee hurting."

Slowly Rick opened his eyes, one at a time.

"I must be in Heaven" Rick thought as the familiar face swam into his field of vision.

"Rick, you okay?"

"I'm dead, Kate." Rick moaned, immersed in self pity.

"No idiot, you're not. But you'll be when I kill you." Kate's scornful voice reached his ears. He smiled.

"I'm dead, Kate. I'm sure."

He saw the beautiful woman roll her eyes. "Come on Rick, get up." Kate held out a hand towards Rick.

Rick tried to lift his arms hesitantly and found them in perfectly working condition. He grasped her outstretched hand and sat up.

"Wow, my body is still functioning." He spoke out almost with an air of idiocy.

Suddenly a movement on the floor caught their attention and they saw Nate, who had been shot in the shoulder, shuffling on the floor. He had somehow produced another gun, seemingly out of nowhere and was aiming at Kate.

A vicious rage boiled over and Rick found himself reaching for his golden gun. In less than a second, he pulled the safety off and shot at Nate McCallum. The bullet hit Nate's extended arm and his gun skidded across the floor.

But that was least of Nate's problems. He was gasping, holding his other palm flat over his chest. Dark red blood seeped through his fingers. Kate stood still, holding her service pistol in her outstretched hand, frozen in her shooting position.

Kate had seen Nate trying to shoot her right on time and she had shot him first.

Kate knelt down beside the dying psychopath and leaned onto him, locking her fiery green eyes into his dim gray. "That one was for my mother, Johanna Beckett." Kate did not recognize the tight, hoarse voice emanating from her own throat.

The killer struggled, trying to say something in response. Instead he gurgled in his own blood and pressed his chest with his hands, trying to stop the air from escaping his punctured lung. The air left his body anyway and so did his life.

Big Nate of America lay lifeless in the abandoned warehouse, surrounded by the trophies of his lifetime of exploits.

"NYPD! Freeze! Don't move!" Javier Esposito's familiar voice was loud and clear. The detectives bustled into the room and took in the scene in front of them.

Rick Castle was sitting on the floor, his hands holding limply a ridiculously expensive gun. Detective Kate Beckett was kneeling on the floor, staring blankly at the lifeless eyes of the dead body. America's most popular man lay dead on the floor. Another unknown man lay dead nearby.

(...)

It was a huge scene and the reporters were having a field day with it.

Captain Victoria Gates had decided to grace the scene with her presence. At present, she was questioning Detective Beckett about her presence in the warehouse and the shooting.

Rick had already fielded his share of questions. He was sitting on a crate inside the warehouse, talking to Ryan and Esposito.

"How did you guys know I was here?" Castle was genuinely curious.

"Beckett, of course. She said that she followed you from the motel and ended up here. She knew something was wrong. So she called me for back up before following you inside." Ryan explained.

"Beckett followed me from my motel? How did she know where I was living?"

Esposito grinned, "She's a detective, remember?"

Lanie hurried past them, helping the CSU as they exhumed the four skeletons. However, she didn't hesitate to glare at Rick and declare, "Rick Castle, I'm going to kill you."

"Sorry Lanie, Beckett has already booked her claim," the writer grinned.

"Don't worry Castle, I'm killing her first."

Esposito looked over at the spot where the tough Captain was still grilling the Detective and sighed. "I wish there was some visual proof of what happened."

"Hey! I have visual proof!" Rick exclaimed as he held out a pen from his pocket. Both Ryan and Esposito turned to look at him like he had gone crazy.

The writer realized that he needed to explain.

"This pen has a micro-camera attached to its clip. When Mike called me, I thought he wanted to show me something important. I brought this with me to record the whole thing. Well... I guess it has recorded the whole thing..." he trailed off, suddenly remembering Mike.

"Holy Shit, Castle! A micro-camera! This is cool... This should free Beckett from the bitch." Esposito started to walk off with the pen.

"Careful Esposito, the pen might still be recording."

Esposito stopped abruptly, looking at the pen and then at the writer. When Rick winked at him, the Hispanic detective shot him a glare and continued towards his Captain.

Ryan eyed Castle incredulously. "You really think you're James Bond, don't you?"

(...)

Two hours later, Kate walked up to Rick. Her face was unreadable.

"Hey detective!" Rick greeted her, cheerily. "How are you feeling?"

"I don't know, Castle."

Rick didn't know what to do. So he stood in front of her, fidgeting slightly.

"Rick, can you take me home?" Her voice was soft, almost inaudible.

Rick looked at Kate for a moment.

"Yes Kate, I'll take you home."

_A/N: So... The case is officially closed. I really really really want Beckett to shoot her mother's killer on the show. "The son of a bitch does not need to see the insides of a courtroom." _

_I tried my best to do the scene some justice but I am not sure of the results. Actually, I am terrified. I do not want to let you guys down. _

_Please tell me what you think of it._

_I initially wanted to end the story with this chapter but I could not. So I will add another chapter to the story. _

_I was thinking may be I could bump up the rating of the next chapter to M and add a bit of smut... would that be too OOC in context of the story? How would you like the story to end? Please guys I need your feedback._

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Castle. I am just a fan._**


	16. Chapter 16

They were standing in front of Rick's building.

Kate was silent, looking up at the building with an unreadable expression on her face. Rick was eyeing her nervously.

"Look Kate, you asked me to take you home but..."

"It's alright. Let's just go inside." Kate's voice held no emotion.

Rick had expected Kate to argue, to fight. Since Kate had known about Montgomery's files and how Rick had kept them a secret from everyone, he was expecting her to explode any moment. Kate's cold compliance was making him uneasy.

Silently, they made their way to the elevator. As the door closed, they stood side by side. Kate was staring ahead at the closed elevator door. Rick continued to observe her.

"Did I grow another head, Castle?" She didn't turn to look at him.

"No."

"Then stop staring."

"I was thinking..." Rick started and then trailed off, not sure if Kate was even listening to him.

"Hmmm?" Okay, so she was listening after all.

"I was thinking this is the first time we're riding the elevator in total silence. It's creepy."

He had expected Kate to roll her beautiful eyes at his weak attempt to lighten the mood. She didn't. But a small smile appeared at the corner of her mouth.

The elevator stopped and they got out, walking across the hall in silence.

Rick opened the door to his loft and they entered. Rick looked around and sighed in relief. It felt good to be home, to be in familiar surroundings.

Suddenly he remembered something. "Shit!"

Kate was beside him in a flash. "What's wrong?"

"I forgot to call Alexis!"

Kate let out a sigh. Alexis and Martha were probably freaking out, sitting wherever they were, not knowing what was happening back at home. "Call her now."

"I'll. First let me get you something..."

Kate cut him short. "No, you're calling your daughter first."

Rick looked at Kate for a moment and then walked into his study with the phone in his hand.

Kate wandered around in the living room, taking in the familiar sight before her. Everything was as she remembered from her stay at the loft before. It felt comforting, close to heart. It felt like home.

Kate wondered for a moment how everything managed to remain so clean when its inhabitants had been away for three months. She reasoned that Rick probably paid someone to look after the loft.

She walked around the couch and sat on it, looking around once again. She half expected the red headed teenager to bustle down the stairs any moment or the front door to open and see Martha doing her "walk of shame" into the house. Without them, the loft seemed eerily silent.

Finally, her mind wandered into the zone that she had been trying to avoid for so long.

Only yesterday, she had no idea who her mother's killer was. Yesterday, she was just a cop who was recovering from a gunshot wound. Yesterday she had a bull's eye painted on her back. Yesterday she was not sure if she would be attacked again; no, scratch that, yesterday she was not sure _when_ she would be attacked again. She was not sure if she would survive the attack. Yesterday, her only obsession in life was to catch her mother's killer. She was desperate to know his name, to put a face to the bastard who took her mother away from her. Yesterday was just a day in her life. Yesterday was almost like any other day since that fateful winter night years ago.

And today, suddenly, it was all over.

There was a strange sense of emptiness. She had been carrying a burden for so long that now when the burden had been lifted, she felt the lightness of her shoulders unsettling. This was a new sensation, an unknown sensation. It was different from the life she had trained herself into living. She suddenly felt overwhelmed. As the enormity of the moment sunk in, she felt the tears prickling in her eyes.

When Rick re-entered the living room, he immediately spotted her tears. Without saying a word, he moved towards her and sat down beside her. For the first time in his life, the writer felt that words were redundant. He took her hand which was resting limply on her thigh and squeezed it slightly, silently reassuring Kate that he was there for her.

Kate leaned against him, resting her head on his strong shoulders.

Neither of them knew how long they sat in silence. Both of them were comfortable.

Kate broke the silence first. "What now, Rick?"

Rick had no difficulty in understanding what Kate meant.

"Now your mom can rest in peace."

Kate was silent for a few more minutes. Tears trickled down her cheeks as memories of her mother hurt and comforted her at the same time.

"I miss her." She was so quiet that Rick would've missed it if he hadn't been listening carefully.

"I know, Kate. I'm so sorry."

"I always thought the day I caught my mom's killer would be the happiest day in my life. Over all these years, I've imagined this moment in thousands of ways. There hasn't been a day I didn't think about it. And now that this is over, I feel I've lost her all over again..." Kate trailed off as her voice broke, trying hard to control her emotions.

Rick put his arm over her shoulder, drawing her closer to the warmth of his body, as he waited quietly for Kate to sort out her emotions.

Kate instinctively snuggled into him some more. His familiar scent was oddly comforting. She was so grateful that she didn't have to do this alone. She was glad that he was there, holding her. She finally let go of her control and let the tears fall freely.

After a long time, Kate was silent again. Rick had the presence of mind to wrap a blanket around their bodies and now she was cocooned in it, comfortably nestled with him.

As Rick watched the darkness of the night fade through the window, he heard Kate speak again.

"For a moment in there, I thought I had lost you."

"Thanks for saving my life." Rick's voice was heavy with emotions.

He felt Kate move away from him, still wrapped inside the blanket. He turned his head to face her.

"You risked your life for me." It was not a question or an accusation.

"It was necessary."

"No Rick, it was not necessary to risk your life for my closure. It was not necessary for you to do this alone." It wasn't an argument. Kate was just stating the facts.

Rick sighed. He didn't know how to respond. He didn't want it to escalate into an argument. Kate certainly didn't need that right now.

"I had to, Kate. That day, at the cemetery, I realized that if anything happens to you, I wouldn't be able to live through it."

"Rick..."

"I figured that we had two options. Either we both die or I die alone. I chose the second option. That way, you'd still be alive and Alexis would have you."

"What made you think I'd be able to survive without you?" The emotions hidden in Kate's soft voice broke his heart.

"You're stronger than me, Kate; far stronger than me. You'd survive."

"Rick, if anything happened to you, I'd never be able to live with myself again. Yes, I'd be alive and I'd be here for Alexis but... but, every day without you would be a torture..." Distress crept into her voice and Rick saw raw emotions in her greenish golden eyes.

Rick couldn't help but lean forward and brush his lips over Kate's. The expert wordsmith knew no word that would do justice to what he was trying to say. So he let his feelings take control of him, with the hope that through the kiss, Kate would see right into his soul.

Rick felt Kate's initial tentative response to his lips. He felt the exact moment when the hesitation disappeared and Kate's emotions started pouring into the kiss. It was soft and gentle, but urgent. It was them, reassuring each other that they were alive. It was their way of letting each other know their feelings that they had never spoken of. The kiss was full of promises that they had never made to each other out loud. It spoke of their love and their need for each other.

As they lost themselves in the reassuring sensation of each other's warmth, they explored the emotions buried deep inside their heart; friendship, trust, sacrifice, warmth, love and... passion. When Kate stumbled across the last feeling, her heart melted and her lips parted involuntarily. Rick took in her lower lip in between his and tasted her sweetness, silently promising her that he was as deep in it as she was.

When they parted, they looked into each other's eyes while still trying to control their erratic breathing. They saw hope, the hope of a future together. It wouldn't be all smooth, it wouldn't be a bed of roses but they would be there for each other.

"Promise me that you'll never leave me again." Kate's voice was practically begging.

"I promise"

"I love you, Rick. God, you've no idea how much I love you. I was so stupid before. I was trying to deny everything I felt..."

Rick cut off her ramblings with another soft kiss.

"Those days are gone Kate. Let's start afresh."

"A future..."

"A wonderful future."

"We'll be fighting a lot, Rick." Kate suddenly snorted out a short laughter, her eyes still wet.

"A lot. God we're both stubborn."

"There'll be days when I'll be all cranky and paranoid and messed up."

"And there'll be days when I'll be unbearably annoying."

"That you already are..."

"Hey!" Rick cried out in mock indignation, followed by a wide grin that matched Kate's.

"You'd probably pester me about eating my lunch on time."

"You'd probably handcuff me to the car every time we go for a take down."

"You'll drive me crazy with your CIA theories."

"And you'll ruin my every story with your logic."

"I'll be jealous every time a bimbo walks up to you in your book parties."

"And I'll die of insecurity every time a handsome detective joins the department."

"We'll fight a lot."

"The makeup sex will be great though."

They laughed out loud at that and then fell silent for a moment, imagining their future together.

"But we'll be happy."

"Yes, we will be happy." Rick smiled.

"We'll always be together."

"We'll grow old together."

Kate let out a contended sigh and then smiled, "Will you still love me when I'm wrinkled and grey?"

Rick pretended to think for a moment. "Hmmm... that depends. Will you still love me when I'm stooping forward and can't remember where I kept my glasses?"

They both laughed softly and leaned forward, their foreheads resting together.

"Always."

"Always."

_A/N: This is the end. I thought a lot about this ending and realized that smut really did not fit. So, I ended this with promises. I really hope I did this some justice because I really worked hard on this chapter. I have been fortunate to have so many wonderful readers and it would be a sin to let you guys down._

_As you guys already know by now, this is my first ever fanfiction. It was an amazing experience. I never expected such amazing feedback. I learnt a lot from your reviews and PMs. I know 15K hits is not much by your standards but as a rookie, I'm overwhelmed! I love you guys a lot!_

_I am addicted to writing. I already have the plot of my next story (probably oneshot) ready in my head. I'll return with it soon. I hope you guys will still be with me then. _

_Anyway, I should stop before I get emotional. Thank you once again. Please remember to let me know if you liked the final chapter. I'll be waiting for your feedback._

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Castle. This is my way of paying tribute to Mr. Andrew W. Marlowe, Terri Miller and the team for creating something so beautiful.**_


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